Practice
by remuslives23
Summary: What's a best friend for if not for practice? "I don't fancy you. We'd just be...practicing." Remus Lupin from Year 1 to 7. How did our fav. werewolf lose his virginity? Please R/R. Ain't too proud to beg!
1. Chapter 1

**Hiya! Welcome to my third posted story. Hope you enjoy.**

**WARNING: No sex for a couple of chappies - they are underage after all. But trust me, when it happens, it was worth waiting for. R/R.**

**Stuffed up first download so replacing. Sorry**

Chapter One

'I'm a what?' whispered a stunned looking Emma Jack, staring at the tall, bearded man in front of her.

'A witch, Miss Jack,' he said gently, seeing the shock on her face. Emma glanced over at her parents, who looked equally as disbelieving despite having spent an hour alone with this man before Emma was called in.

'Dad?' she asked tremulously and he tried to smile.

'It's alright, sweetheart,' he said, his words betrayed by his look of concern and bewilderment. 'Mr…um…Professor Dumbledore will explain.'

He and his wife both turned to the strangely dressed man, hoping to hear an explanation this time that they could begin to comprehend. They were normal, average people - whose world as they knew it had just been turned upside down.

Albus Dumbledore smiled at them, then turned to look at Emma, who looked pale. 'This very day, young Emma, witches and wizards around the country will be receiving letters just like the one I handed you,' he said and Emma looked down at the envelope he'd given her earlier.

'Sometimes, because of family history or sometimes just pure chance, Non Magical parents, like yours, produce a magical child. In this case - you.'

He smiled at her and she tried to smile back, her mind still refusing to believe what he was telling her. 'On the occasion of a young wizard or witch's eleventh year, they receive their letter to attend Hogwarts School of Wizardry. There, they will learn more about their gift and how to use it properly.'

He could see the young girl was still almost as terrified as she'd been when he walked in, her parents also looking as though they were in the middle of a nightmare. They needed proof. 'Shall I show you some magic?' he said suddenly, standing up.

Her blue eyes widened and she looked quickly over at her parents, who also stood. Albus pulled out his wand and pointed it at a vase of flowers and, with one wave, turned each petal into a butterfly that fluttered around Emma's head in a circle. Emma stared up at the butterflies, her mouth open.

'Wow,' she whispered, then looked at Dumbledore again, this time ready to believe. 'Children are always more accepting than the parents,' Albus thought, seeing the panic on her parent's faces.

He waved his wand again and the butterflies disappeared.

Emma's eyes were on his wand. 'Will I have to use one of those?' she asked nervously, her wide eyes moving from the wand to his eyes.

'Yes,' he said with a smile. 'There is a list of supplies you'll need in the letter, as well as a map to get to Diagon Alley and the name of someone who can help show you around once you're there. As you can imagine,' he said, turning to her parents. 'We need to keep our world a secret. Non magical people often have difficulty accepting the differences between us.'

Mrs Jack sank into her chair and her husband looked over at his daughter. 'We have her enrolled at a local school already. A norm…non magical school. Does she have to go to, um, Hogwarts?' he asked the bearded man who smiled.

'She does not have to attend,' he admitted, putting his wand away. 'But she will still be a witch. An untrained magical child can be a very dangerous thing. Does Emma already display some…unusual traits, characteristics?'

Her parents shook their heads but Emma piped up, 'Um, is that why I can make things move?'

All three adults looked at her and she went pink. 'I can make things move sometimes - without touching them,' she told them. 'I never told anyone. I thought it was weird.' 'Can you show me, Emma?' Albus asked and she nodded, turning to the television and concentrating on the remote control. After a few seconds, it flew across the room to her and her parents gasped.

'Em, why didn't you ever tell us?' Mrs Jack asked, staring at her daughter.

'Because I didn't want you to know I was a freak,' the preteen mumbled, staring at the floor.

'You are not a freak, I assure you,' Albus said gently, sitting down in front of her again. 'You are a witch, and a very talented one by the looks of it.'

He smiled at her and this time she grinned back. 'Perhaps it would help to know that you already know a wizarding family,' he said, glancing over at Mr and Mrs Jack. 'Who?' Mr Jack asked, startled.

'The Lupins,' he said, looking over at Emma, who looked confused.

'Remus?' she exclaimed, torn between disbelief and joy. 'He's like me? He's a w..wizard?'

Albus nodded and Emma smiled. 'So, he'll be going to H…Hogwarts?'

'It appears so,' he told her. 'I've just come from seeing his parents, in fact. Perhaps, a conversation with them would help answer some of your questions. They both attended Hogwarts…'

'John and Liz are…magic?' Mrs Jack asked faintly.

'Yes,' Albus confirmed, then stood up. 'I'm sure they would be more than happy to discuss any concerns with you.

He made his way to the door, quickly followed by Mr Jack who shook his hand before he left. Emma looked down at her letter, opening it up again and rereading it as her parents moved to the kitchen to talk quietly. She was struggling to take this all in but one thing kept invading her thoughts. Remus Lupin, her best friend since they were in nappies, was a wizard.

'He never told me,' she thought with a frown. 'Why didn't he ever tell me?'

She looked towards the kitchen, seeing her parents with their heads together. Standing up, she grabbed a pen and scrawled a quick note telling them she was going to Remus' house and left it on the table before slipping quietly out the front door.

* * *

She walked up the block, knocking on the front door and seeing Remus peek out before flinging the door open.

'Hi!' he said cheerily, letting her in. 'Where've you been all day?'

He pushed the door shut and walked down the hall, leading her to his bedroom. Throwing himself onto his bed, he finally looked at her properly and saw her troubled face.

'What's wrong?' he asked with a frown.

'You can do magic,' she said accusingly and his dark blue eyes widened.

'What?' he asked, trying to buy some time.

'Professor Dumbledore told me,' she said, sitting on the bed opposite him. 'Why didn't you, Lupin?'

She must be mad - she was using his surname. They only did that when they were pissed or teasing, taking off their teachers at their elementary school who did it.

'I couldn't,' he said, leaning towards her, figuring if Dumbledore had told her, it would be alright. 'I wanted to, Em. I wasn't allowed. You're a Muggle.'

'A what?' she asked, sounding insulted.

'Not magical,' he told her quickly. 'You're not a witch so I couldn't tell you.'

'Actually, I am,' she retorted, handing him the letter.

He looked as stunned as she still felt as he took the parchment and read it. 'Wow,' he murmured then reached over to his desk to grab his own letter to compare them. 'It's real? You're a witch?'

Emma nodded, looking as if she wasn't sure she liked being called a witch.

'You're going to Hogwarts with me?' he realised, staring at her with a broad smile. 'Em, we're going to school together!'

Emma couldn't help but smile at his eagerness. They'd been friends so long and they relied on each other. They'd been dreading spending most of the year apart at separate schools but now…

'Aren't you happy?' he frowned, seeing her less than enthusiastic smile.

Emma bit her lip then looked down at her hands. 'I don't want to be a witch,' she muttered. 'I want to be normal.'

Remus stared at her and realised what a shock this must have been for her. He had known from an early age that his parent's were magical and he showed signs of following in their footsteps at two. Emma's and her parents were Muggles, at least her parents were, and they'd known nothing about the magical world Remus knew - until today.

'Do you want to talk about it?' he asked, turning to look closely at her. 'I could show you some of mum and dad's old books about spells and things.'

She looked up from her hands and he could see curiosity and gratefulness in her eyes. When she nodded, Remus grinned and jumped up, grabbing her hand and pulling her along with him.

'Mum, dad!' he called, finding his parents in the kitchen. 'Guess what? Emma's a witch! She's going to Hogwarts!'

'Maybe,' Emma broke in and Remus turned to stare at her.

'You might not go?' he asked with a frown. 'Why not?'

She shrugged but Mrs Lupin thought she knew.

'It must have been a shock for you and your parents, Emma,' she said gently, coming over and putting her arm around the eleven year old. 'Especially when you were all set to go to St Augustine's. You don't have to go to Hogwarts, love, but you'll always be a witch. It might be good to go and learn more about your powers.'

Mr Lupin interrupted. 'Maybe we should call Kathy and Doug, Liz,' he said. 'Maybe we should all sit down and talk.'

Mrs Lupin agreed and wandered over to the phone. 'Can I show Em some of your old school books?' Remus asked his father and the man nodded.

'They're in the attic,' he said, smiling at the two of them. 'Be careful. There's a lot of junk up there.'

Remus took Emma's hand and led her up the stairs to the dusty, crowded attic. Emma coughed then gasped when she walked into a cobweb.

'Why don't you find them and bring them down?' she suggested and Remus laughed. 'No way,' he said, jumping a little when he heard a scuttling noise in the corner. 'There. That's dad's trunk.'

He pushed aside an old dresser and sat down in front of the large trunk. 'He'll have to get this down for me,' he said with a grin at Emma when she sat next to him. 'Professor Dumbledore bought me my letter today too.'

Emma looked at him curiously as he opened the trunk. 'Does he go and see everyone?' she asked and his face turned pink.

'Um, no,' he said, pulling out a book. 'I don't think so. Here, this one is a Potions book. We'll learn to make different kind of Potions for different things. See, there's one for making things bigger, and one to make something smaller.'

Emma looked amazed, forgetting all about her questions regarding Remus' personal visit from their future Headmaster. Remus kept her distracted, showing her books and retelling stories about the school that his parents told him. He didn't want her to know why Dumbledore had visited him; didn't want her to know that until this morning, he had thought he'd miss out on going to Hogwarts with other witches and wizards.

Remus was a werewolf, bitten when he was two years old. It was another secret he'd never revealed to his best friend, a fact he'd always felt guilty about. Emma knew he got sick a lot and worried about him, but he couldn't tell her.

'At least it's only one secret now,' he thought, looking at his friend as she bent over the book, trying to read in the dim lighting. 'I can't believe she's a witch.'

He frowned then asked the question that just occurred to him. 'Em, I can do some magic now,' he told her, seeing her look up. 'Just little things sometimes when I'm not really thinking about it. Can you do anything?'

Emma looked guilty and he raised his eyebrows. 'You never told me,' he accused and she shook her head.

'I didn't want you to think I was some kind of nut,' she said quietly, looking down at the book. 'I thought you wouldn't want to be my friend anymore.'

Remus put his hand over hers and smiled. 'Jack, you're my best mate,' he told her. 'I'd never think badly of you.'

She looked up at him and smiled. 'Want to see what I can do?' she asked and he grinned, nodding eagerly.

Emma looked around and concentrated on a hat hanging across the room. It flew towards her, landing on the floor between them. 'Wow, Em,' he said with a smile. 'I can't do that.'

Emma looked pleased with herself and was starting to get excited about the prospect of going to a magical school.

She and Remus spent another hour going through the books before they heard Mr Lupin call for them to come downstairs.

They walked into the kitchen and Mrs Lupin stood up. 'Ugh, you're both filthy,' she exclaimed, turning them around and sending them to the sink. 'Wash up so you can have some lunch.'

Emma caught sight of her parents and grinned. They smiled back, looking a little less shaky than they had earlier. She and Remus washed up, flicking a little water at each other as they did.

'You've got a cobweb in your hair,' Remus told her, pulling the sticky threads out of her mahogany coloured hair, noticing the hint of red shining brighter as the sun hit it. 'Oh, get it out,' she pleaded, shuddering as she stood still.

Remus pulled all of the cobweb out gently, careful not to pull at her hair. 'Jeez, what did you do, Jack, roll around in it?' he muttered, seeing her wince as he accidentally pulled on some strands. 'Sorry.'

He had his head close to hers and suddenly, the smell of her hair reached him, making him squirm a little.

'She smells good,' he noticed for the first time then frowned at the wriggling feeling in his stomach. 'Like vanilla.'

He'd never really thought of Emma as a girl but for some reason, this fact hit him quite hard right now. He quickly pulled out the last bit of thread and stepped back, a little confused.

'Done,' he mumbled, washing his hands.

'Ta,' Emma said, oblivious to his agitation as she ran a hand through her hair and walked back to the table.

* * *

They ate sandwiches and listened to the adults talking - making faces at each other occasionally. When they all finished eating, the children excused themselves to go to Remus' room and talk.

'You should come to Diagon Alley with me and my mum,' Remus said, putting some music on and smiling as Emma kicked her shoes off then flung herself across his bed. 'Is that where I'll get all the magic stuff?' she asked and he nodded, pulling her letter towards him, lying next to her.

'Defence Against the Dark Arts,' Emma murmured as she read the note over his shoulder, then looked alarmed. 'Dark arts? What does that mean?'

'Bad magic,' Remus answered, feeling a little uncomfortable. He was considered a dark creature. 'Killing spells, torture spells and that sort of thing.'

Emma frowned and chewed the inside of her mouth. 'Are there people…wizards and witches…who use that kind of magic?' she asked, sounding a bit scared.

'None that we'll meet,' he assured her, taking her hand and squeezing her fingers. 'Are you a little bit excited yet?'

She grinned at him and nodded then leaned over and hugged him. 'I'm really glad we can go together,' she said into his ear and he smiled.

'So am I,' he replied.

There was the sound of a clearing throat from the open door way and they broke apart, Emma smiling at her mother.

'Are we going?' she asked and the woman nodded.

'Yes,' she said with a smile. 'I think you're going to need some new clothes if you're going to boarding school.'

Remus grinned and Emma jumped up, throwing herself at her mother. 'Thanks, mum,' she exclaimed. 'Are you ok with me going?'

'I'll miss you,' the woman said, smiling down at her. 'But…you need to learn how to be the person you are supposed to be.'

Emma smiled again then her mother told her to say good bye. 'Five minutes,' she warned, then waved to Remus.

They grinned at each other then Emma squealed and hugged Remus tight. 'This is so exciting, Remus,' she whispered.

He agreed then smiled when he pulled away. 'Come and see me tomorrow?' he asked, walking down the stairs after her. 'We'll go through the rest of dad's old books. I'll bring them down first.'

She giggled and nodded, seeing her parents waiting. 'Bye, Lupin,' she said, and he waved.

'See ya, Jack.'


	2. Chapter 2

**Sorry Fleaks!! I was going to PM you but I'm not sure you're getting them. Humbly begging for forgiveness - hope you haven't given up on me :( I'd cry. Missing you at Fire and Water today.**

**Sex is coming. They're still underage but it'll be worth waiting for. Cross my heart X**

Chapter Two

A week before they were leaving, Mrs Lupin took both Emma and her mother along to Diagon Alley to get the children's school belongings. Mrs Jack and Emma were stunned to see the world that existed alongside their own; a world they'd known nothing about but had now been dragged into.

'Oh my God,' Mrs Jack muttered as they walked into Gringott's bank.

Emma shrank into her mother's side as they stared at the goblins that worked there. 'Try not to stare,' Mrs Lupin warned them and they quickly looked away while Mrs Lupin organised the exchange of Muggle money for Wizarding cash.

Remus sat and explained the gold, silver and bronze coins to Emma and Mrs Jack while his own mother took a cart deep down into the bowels of the bank to their vault. He carefully avoided touching the silver Sickles - they'd burn his hand if he touched them. Silver was deadly for a werewolf.

'Right,' Mrs Lupin said when she came back. 'I think that we should get the uniforms and wands first before these two get fidgety.'

She looked at the eleven year olds who looked as though they couldn't wait to get amongst the unfamiliar stalls and stores outside. 'Then we can let them wander around while we get their books and supplies. It'll be quicker if we do it ourselves.'

They made their way to a store where they were both stood on stools and measured for robes, the witch explaining that the uniforms were magical.

'When you are sorted into your House, you will see the lapels of each cloak change to your house colour. The school will supply your ties after the Sorting.'

Emma was about to ask about the Houses when she was distracted by the woman shearing off some extra material around her hem with a wand. 'You can use wands for everything?' she asked and the woman looked up at her with a chuckle.

'You're from a Muggle family, aren't you, love?' she asked and Emma nodded, blushing when the woman laughed again.

'Wands can be used for almost anything,' she told her, then frowned down at the hem.

'These are my smallest robes and I've still had to take off a bit of material,' she told Emma's mother. 'She's so petite. Let's hope she doesn't have a massive growth spurt or you'll be looking for new robes.'

She wandered over to choose some shirts and Remus looked over at Emma. 'You look hilarious,' he teased. The robe still looked too big for her. 'Like you're trying on your mum's clothes.'

'She is really small,' he thought, noticing for the first time how much taller than her he was. They'd both always been a bit short and skinny but he realised he towered over her by an inch or two now.

Emma glared at him and poked her tongue out. 'Hate being short,' she muttered, then closed her mouth when the woman came over to finish with them.

They both stood in front of a mirror when she was done, staring at themselves in awe. 'This is awesome,' Emma breathed and Remus grinned.

'Yep,' he agreed.

* * *

They left their robes to get final adjustments and went to a wand store, a small man with silver eyes staring at them as they walked in, their mother's waiting outside. 'Best to let them do this themselves,' Mrs Lupin said to Emma's mother, who looked nervous.

'Ah, Hogwarts, yes?' the little man said, smiling a little creepily at them.

He gestured them forwards and they shuffled nearer, Emma sliding her hand into Remus' as they pressed closer.

'Hmm,' he said, cocking his head slightly as he looked at Emma. 'You're going to be difficult.'

He turned to Remus instead and told him to hold out his wand arm as a tape measure flew at him, taking measurements every which way. Emma watched nervously as the man wandered through towering stacks of long, thin boxes, then saw him pull a couple out.

'Try this one first,' he said to Remus, handing him a wand. 'Cherry and Hippogriff Talon.'

Remus waved it in the air but nothing happened. 'Nope,' the man stated, yanking it out of his hand. 'Next - Mahogany and phoenix feather.'

Remus repeated his actions but again, nothing happened. 'Why aren't they working?' Emma whispered to her friend, but it was Mr Ollivander that answered.

'The wand chooses the wizard, my dear. There is a perfect wand for every person. We just have to find it.'

He handed Remus another wand and this time, he felt it quiver as it touched his skin, Emma also feeling it as she held his hand. Yanking her hand out of his, she backed off a little as the wand emitted several gold sparks.

'Put it down,' she told him but Ollivander shook his head with a smile.

'That's the wand,' he said, taking it and polishing it. 'Oak and Dragon heart string.' Emma looked at Remus, who looked thrilled.

'He doesn't actually mean a dragon, does he?' she asked him and he nodded.

'Now, young lady, it is your turn,' the man said, turning to look thoughtfully at her before disappearing into the stacks.

The tape measure wrapped around her right arm, flying away when Ollivander returned. 'You are a little more difficult, my dear,' he told her. 'You have only just discovered what you are…you have no sense of yourself as a witch yet. You could be good. Very strong.'

He looked at the half a dozen boxes he'd bought to the counter, pushing two aside. 'Try this one first. Rosewood and Chimaera scale.'

She looked reluctant but took the wand, feeling nothing but cool wood. 'Did it work?' she asked and he shook his head, handing her a second wand. 'This one is Veela hair and Yew.'

'What the hell is a Veela?' she mumbled, but took the wand, again feeling nothing.

Ollivander stared at her then turned abruptly to walk to the back of the store. 'Strong wand,' he muttered then turned back to Emma with an appraising look. 'Hold out your wand arm.'

She did and he smiled. 'Think of yourself holding a wand,' he told her.

Emma glanced over at Remus, who shrugged. She sighed and closed her eyes, imagining herself with a wand. She felt something hit her hand then heard a thump as she opened her eyes.

'Ahh,' Ollivander said with a smile. 'Willow and unicorn hair. A good wand. Strong but flexible. Try it - but there's no doubt it's yours.'

'Are there really unicorns?' she asked, watching him untie the box.

'Of course,' he said, with a smile. 'I plucked this hair from the mane of a magnificent female - proud, strong. Don't know why I didn't think of this one myself.'

He held the wand out to her and she closed her hand around it, instantly feeling it warming her skin. Gold sparks shot out the end of the wand, as it had done for Remus, and she nearly dropped it. Emma let out a shuddering breath and looked around at Remus who was smiling at her.

'Cool, Em,' he said softly. She grinned and turned back.

Mr Ollivander took the wand off her and polished it before putting it back into the box.

'You'll be strong,' he told her as they paid for their wands. 'Once you overcome your fears.'

His eyes turned to Remus, and the boy felt as though the man was seeing into his soul. 'So will you,' he told him with a smile. 'Once you accept who you are.'

Remus felt a little shiver and had no doubt that the man knew exactly what he was.

They collected their wands and went out to show them off to their parents. 'Can we go now?' Remus asked, bouncing a little. He wanted to show Emma around the world that he'd wanted to tell her about for so long.

'Is it safe?' Mrs Jack asked as she looked around.

'Perfectly safe,' Mrs Lupin assured the other woman. 'Remus has been here many times.'

She looked at her son. 'Stay in the main alley,' she warned him. 'No detours. Here's some money for lunch. We'll meet you in a couple of hours in the Hogs' Head alright?'

Remus nodded, taking the money and waiting impatiently for Emma's mum to sort out the Magical money then grabbed Emma's hand and ran off.

'They are just friends, aren't they?' Mrs Jack said, with a frown. 'They're so young but they grow up much quicker these days than we did. They're going off to school together and, although I'm grateful she'll have him…'

'I don't think any alternative to friendship has even occurred to them yet,' Mrs Lupin said with a smile. 'Remus adores Emma. He'd never hurt her - boyfriend or not - and Hogwarts is supervised well. Don't worry so much, Kathy. She'll be fine.'

* * *

Remus and Emma explored, Remus thrilled to be able show Emma around. He dragged her to the store where the flying broomsticks were, Emma marvelling that so many things she'd thought were fairy tales were true. He finally convinced her to stop for lunch.

'I'm starving, Em,' he moaned until she gave in.

She peppered him with questions all through the meal, looking through one of the books she'd bought. 'How do they get the pictures to move?' she asked, wide eyed, watching the people in the photo's shifting and waving.

'Smphiminzeprffezn,' he mumbled, mouth full of sandwich.

She looked up at him and giggled. 'What?' she said, closing the book finally and taking a bite of her own food.

He swallowed and said, 'Something in the processing.'

He watched her look around while she ate, grinning at her. 'What's so funny?' she asked, catching him and he shook his head.

'Just happy I can finally show you all this,' he told her, finishing the last of his drink. 'I'm sorry, Em. I wanted to tell you but I couldn't.'

'I know,' she said with a smile. 'I'm sorry I didn't tell you I could do magic.' She laughed. 'That sounds really strange.'

Remus grinned then stood up. 'Ready to meet our mothers?' he asked and she nodded, grabbing her books.

They caught the train a week later, Remus' parents taking Emma through the brick barrier after a tearful goodbye with her family.

'Will you sit with me?' she asked as they tried to find a seat.

Remus heard the waver in her voice and knew how nervous she was. 'Course I will,' he said, squeezing her hand quickly then they found seats alongside some other First Years.

Emma didn't pay too much attention, distracted by the thousands of butterflies that had taken flight in her stomach.

'I'm not a witch,' she thought, biting her lip. 'There's been a mistake. I can't do this.'

She and Remus talked quietly after lunch, Remus showing her Chocolate Frogs and Emma deciding she was going to stick with Muggle Jelly beans after getting a sardine flavoured Bertie Botts bean.

'We can order some chocolate from Honeydukes,' he told her. 'Mum gets some in for me for my birthday and it's like nothing you've ever tasted.'

He told her only good things - how good the feasts were supposed to be at Hogwarts, how they'd be learning to do spells with their new wands; how they'd be able to send messages to their parent's with the owl they decided they'd share. Happy to see her smiling more, he kept going, emphasising the positive and playing down the fact that she knew so little still about this world she'd be living in.

Emma smiled, inwardly laughing. She knew exactly what he was doing, and was grateful. He was calming her down, just like he always did. Remus was so…patient, and sweet. He was rational and sensible, making her stop and think before she flew off into a tizz. Even she had to admit, she was easy to rile up - headstrong, passionate and not usually put off her game, getting back up quickly when she was knocked down.

Until the last few weeks.

* * *

It was dark when they arrived at the train station, both Emma and Remus' eyes opening wide when they saw the huge, hairy man calling out for the First Years to follow him. Emma snagged a seat next to Remus in the small boats they were taking to the castle.

'Hello, again,' a dark haired boy said, smiling at them. They'd met him on the train. Emma thought. 'What was his name again? James or was it the other one? Um, Simon? Sirion?'

'Sirius!' she heard someone call and he waved across to another boat.

'So, what house do you two want to be in?' the boy with the glasses said.

'He's James,' Emma remembered.

'My mum and dad were in Ravenclaw,' Remus said with a shrug. 'I guess I will be too.' He looked over at Emma who frowned. 'I don't know,' she said. 'What's the best one?' James grinned and said, 'Gryffindor, of course.'

She smiled at the look on his face and shrugged. 'I guess I'll just go where Remus does,' she said but James shook his head.

'You don't choose,' he told her. 'You get sorted.'

'I don't have a choice?' she said with a frown which deepened when he shook his head.

Remus saw her looking worried and piped up. 'I'm starving,' he said. 'Is it true they have a feast on the first night?'

The rest of the way, they talked about what might be waiting for them.

Their guesses weren't far wrong - the castle was huge and imposing and, when a teacher led them into the Great Hall, Emma started to shake.

'It's alright, Jack,' Remus murmured, though he'd started to feel a little nervous himself. 'We're sticking together no matter what, alright?'

He saw her nod and take a breath, stiffening that back bone of steel he knew she had. She was gutsy, getting him into all kinds of trouble at home. It was a little disorientating for them both to have a bit of a role swap - Remus being the strong one and Emma needing picking up.

Remus got called first to get sorted and, to his surprise, was sent to Gryffindor. 'Hope you get into Gryffindor,' mumbled a voice and she turned to see James grin at her. 'I'm sure I'm going to.'

She looked a little startled but when he winked at her, she couldn't help smiling. 'James Potter,' called the witch in front, James grinning as he sauntered to the front and got sorted exactly where he'd wanted to. A red headed girl was also sent to Gryffindor then Emma's name was called.

Sitting up straighter now, Remus clenched his jaw. 'Gryffindor,' he thought hard. 'Please be Gryffindor.'

He wanted Emma to be in the same house as him for both their sakes. He needed a friend.

The look of relief on Emma's face when the hat called out, 'Gryffindor!' made it obvious she'd been praying for the same thing.

'Thank God,' she muttered to him as she fell onto the seat next to him.

He laughed and hugged her before she was greeted by some of the older students.

When everyone was sorted, the Headmaster spoke for a few moments then the food appeared from nowhere on the table, startling all the new students. They ate, Emma relaxing as she talked to the other students. The red head was Lily Evans, there was also a blonde girl called Mary and a girl with light brown hair called Alice. Remus too was getting to know his room mates, meeting Peter Pettigrew and Frank Longbottom, the other First Years boys, for the first time. James Potter was sitting next to him and nudged him in the ribs.

'Hey, Remus,' he whispered. 'Emma's pretty. Is she your girlfriend?'

Remus looked surprised and shook his head. 'No,' he muttered, quickly glancing towards his friend.

He'd never really thought of her as pretty but now he looked he supposed she was. Her long reddish brown hair was held back in a long plait but he knew when it was loose, it hung down to her shoulder blades. She had big, blue eyes that couldn't hide any thought or emotion to save her, a straight nose and nice smile. One tooth on the top was slightly crooked and she had a splattering of freckles across her nose that he knew she hated with a passion, as she did the white scar on her forehead that he'd given her four years ago. They'd been mucking around at his house and he'd pushed her. She'd tripped over a toy and hit her head on the coffee table.

As they stood up to find their common rooms, he noticed she was smaller than the other girls by an inch or so and she looked pretty scrawny.

'What's up with you?' she asked, feeling his gaze on her.

'Nothing,' he said, then fell back to walk with her.

'James asked if you were my girlfriend,' he whispered once the other boys were out of earshot. 'He thinks you're pretty.'

She looked at him sharply with a frown. 'He just said that?' she asked and he nodded, grinning at her.

'You've only been here a few hours and you've already got a guy after you, Jack,' he teased. 'You'll make all the boys fall for you after a week.'

'Shut up, Lupin,' she muttered, turning red as she stalked off to walk by herself.

He chuckled and caught her up, teasing her softly until they reached the stairs where they were distracted by the moving portraits.


	3. Chapter 3

**First kiss in this chappie - couldn't leave you with no sexual contact whatsoever for too long. It just gets hotter from here.**

Chapter Three

Over the year, Emma and Remus grew closer, spending time together at school and during holidays. They also got to know their room mates, Remus developing a close friendship with James, Sirius and Peter in particular. They were lying on Remus' floor looking through their books for Second Year when Emma shut her Defence book and sat up.

'Can I ask you something?' she said and Remus looked up.

'Course you can,' he answered, rolling over onto his side.

'Will you tell me the truth? No matter what?' she asked, her fingers fiddling with the hem of her peasant skirt. 'And not take offence?'

Remus frowned and sat up, facing her. 'Alright,' he agreed, warily.

She took a breath and looked at his blue eyes. 'Are you a werewolf?'

He couldn't have hidden it if he'd tried and he was so stunned he didn't even try.

'You are, aren't you?' she said tremulously.

She'd been thinking about this for nearly six months. She was a voracious reader, as was he, and, wanting to learn more about this world, she'd devoured her school books and any other reading material she put her hands on. Whilst reading about werewolves, a few sentences struck a chord. The type of injuries that could be expected matched Remus' scars; the change in his personality and eye colour just before he got sick - he became moodier, tireder and his eyes seemed more hazel than blue; his illness' had always been about once every four weeks or so and, once she started to make note of them, she compared them to the lunar charts to find they coincided with the full moon.

Emma had kept quiet for half a year, wanting to be absolutely sure before she confronted him. She wasn't upset that he'd kept it from her - she understood why he'd done it.

'Yes,' he admitted, biting his lip as it shook. 'Em…'

'It's alright,' she said reassuringly. 'I haven't told anyone. I wouldn't.'

'I know,' he said shakily. 'Do you hate me?'

'No,' she insisted, frowning at him. 'Why? You're still the same person you were before I knew. And, if I stop being your friend, who's going to help me with my Defence homework? Potter? I don't think so.'

He smiled and let out a soft laugh. 'He'd love to help you,' he murmured, knowing James was alternating his crush between Lily Evans and Emma right now and if either girl showed an interest, he'd jump for joy.

'He's a prat,' Emma said matter of factly. 'And Sirius is hotter - all the girls think so.' Remus grimaced, having trouble believing that she'd just found out he was a werewolf and she was talking about which of their friends were better looking.

She leaned back against his bed and grinned. 'And I know someone who thinks you're cute, Lupin,' she teased, her eyes dancing. 'Alice.'

He frowned and looked a bit uncomfortable. 'Really?' he asked and she giggled.

'You should ask her out,' she said, nudging his leg with her foot.

He shook his head and she frowned. 'Is this because of the werewolf thing?' she asked and he laughed disbelievingly.

'Em, most people think werewolves are awful, for a good reason,' he told her. 'I'm dangerous.'

Emma arched an eyebrow. 'I'm more dangerous than you, Lupin,' she growled and he laughed. 'Look, Remus. I've had six months to think about this and get used to it. I would have disappointed if you said you weren't a werewolf. I was sure I was right. As usual.'

He chuckled again. 'Thanks, Jack,' he said and she leaned over and kissed his cheek.

'Ask Alice to go for a walk around the grounds with you,' she advised, lying back down on the floor. 'Just make sure you finish helping me with my homework before the snogging begins.'

* * *

Their second year went as quickly as the first, Remus coming to find Emma late one night towards the end of the year.

'Em,' he hissed, seeing her by the fire going through the subject choices for next year. She came over to him and he pulled her into a far corner of the common room.

'They know,' he whispered urgently.

'Who knows what?' she asked and he made an impatient noise.

'James, Sirius and Peter,' he said desperately. 'They know what I am.'

Her eyes widened and she drew him further into the corner.

'How?' she asked with a frown and he explained that they, like her, had guessed from his frequent absences.

Emma stared at him for a moment then asked, 'How…how did they react?'

Remus calmed down a little. 'Um, alright,' he admitted. 'They said they wouldn't tell anyone and they're still my friends.'

Emma smiled and took his face between her hands. 'That's good news, Lupin,' she said. 'And if they do tell anyone, I'll beat them up for you.'

He laughed, wondering how she managed to do this - distract him and make him laugh when all he'd wanted to do was cry.

'Yeah, right,' he muttered now, drawing himself to his full height and looking down at her - almost a head shorter than him. 'Although, you're such a short ass they'd never see you coming, I suppose.'

She smacked him across the belly and turned away. 'I can see my help isn't appreciated here,' she grumbled but he grabbed her hand.

'Thanks, Em,' he said softly and she smiled.

'Tell me what subjects to take next year and we'll be even,' she suggested and he obliged, following her over to the table.

* * *

Third year came and with it the excitement of beginning new subjects and the prospect of visiting Hogsmeade, a nearby wizarding village. Remus never asked Alice out but now Emma was encouraging him to ask Mary to go to Hogsmeade with him for Halloween.

'Why not?' she asked, lying across his bed a few days before the visit.

'Because I don't want to,' he told her for the third time. 'She's not my type.'

'Your type,' she mocked playfully. 'I thought horny teenagers had only one type - breathing.'

'Jack!' he admonished, his face going pink.

'What?' she asked with a grin. 'You're a teenager. You're a boy so of course you're horny.'

He smacked her across the head with his pillow and she yelped, grabbing it but unable to wrestle it off him. 'You're too scrawny to beat me,' he teased, putting the pillow back under his head.

'I'm not scrawny,' she snapped uncharacteristically as she sat up.

Remus looked surprised and immediately apologised. 'Sorry, Emma,' he said. 'I didn't mean to upset you.'

She sighed and slid off the bed. 'No,' she muttered. 'It's me. It's just…' Her face turned red and she shook her head. 'Never mind.'

'Em,' he said, stopping her. 'Tell me what's wrong.'

'It's embarrassing,' she mumbled, sitting down next to him.

He waited and after several moments she sighed loudly. 'I'm skinny,' she whispered and he frowned.

'Yeah?' he agreed cautiously, not sure why that was a bad thing. 'I thought girls wanted to be thin.'

'They also want boobs,' she ground out, crossing her arms over her own flat chest. Remus bit his lip, not sure how to respond. 'Boys like girls with boobs,' she continued, face flaming. 'I've got none. I guess I'm just sick of looking like a boy.'

He smiled and put his arm around her. 'You don't look like a boy, Em,' he said softly. 'And if big boobs is all a guy is asking you out for, then he's not the kind of guy you'd want anyway, is he?'

Her jaw clenched but she nodded. 'Suppose,' she pouted and he pulled her closer.

'I think you're perfect the way you are,' he told her and she let out a breath of laughter.

'You're a good friend, Lupin,' she said quietly. He kissed her on the head then she patted his knee.

'See you later,' she murmured, walking out of the room, passing Sirius on the way.

He smiled then turned to watch her walk down the stairs. 'Nice,' he muttered then glanced at Remus. 'Are you sure you two aren't together?'

'No, Sirius,' he said wearily, growing tired of the question. 'We are not together.'

'I should ask her out,' the black haired boy mused. 'She's pretty cute.'

Remus turned to look at him and said, 'No.'

Sirius looked at him in surprise. 'What do you mean, "no"?' he said.

'I've seen how quickly you go through girls, Sirius,' Remus said firmly. 'And you aren't treating Emma like that.'

Sirius looked mutinous and Remus continued. 'You can have any other girl in the school. Just lay off Em, alright? I don't want to see her hurt. I don't want to have to choose sides.'

Sirius stared at him then sighed. 'If she continues to show no interest in me, then I won't ask her out,' he agreed. 'But if she does, all bets are off.'

Remus nodded, figuring it was the best he was going to get. They got into bed, leaving the lamps on for James, Peter and Frank.

'Incidentally, Moony,' Sirius asked, calling Remus by his nickname. 'Who would you choose? If you had to.'

'You're a good mate, Sirius,' Remus said softly. 'But there'd be no contest. It would be Emma.'

Sirius was quiet for a few moments then said, 'Are you sure you don't like her?'.

Remus sighed loudly. 'Good night, Sirius,' he said, finality in his tone.

* * *

Nine months later, they were back home, spending the summer alternating between each other's houses. Emma visited Lily several times, and Remus, James and Peter cruised between each other's houses, Sirius spending time with each of them but refusing to allow them to visit him at his place. They were visiting Remus when Emma came over one day and they spent the day together, Sirius watching her closely and finding opportunities to be close to her. Remus frowned, warning Sirius again about their deal.

'I can flirt,' the black haired boy said with a grin. 'And if she flirts back then I'm in with a chance.'

He glared at them now from across the room where he was supposedly watching a game of chess between Peter and James. Sirius was looking through their new textbooks with Emma, sitting close.

He laughed at something Emma said then she stood up, stretching a little before calling, 'Who wants a drink?'

Everyone did and she disappeared into the Lupin's kitchen, unaware of Remus' eyes on her. He was startled to realise that she wasn't all that scrawny anymore, her stretch having tightened her clothing.

'She got boobs,' he thought with a jolt. And hips. She was still shorter than most other fourteen year old girls but she was filling out.

Remus pushed those thoughts out of his head, disturbed he'd even noticed. 'I wouldn't have noticed if she was James or Sirius,' he told himself then stood up to help her with the cans of drink.

Sirius pulled her to the side later that afternoon when the three boys were leaving and spoke into her ear. Emma looked a little startled but smiled and shrugged, making Sirius smile. He saw his friend take her hand then kiss her on the cheek before he joined Peter and James in James' dad's car. Remus looked at Emma, seeing her red face.

'Well, well, well,' he said with a grin. 'What was all that about?'

She looked up and he was surprised to see her confusion. 'What was he doing?' she asked softly and Remus frowned, then turned when he heard his parent's come inside.

'Finally,' they said dramatically. 'We have our house back. You staying for dinner, Emma love?'

'Yes,' Remus answered for her then took her hand. 'We're going to listen to some music upstairs.'

He dragged her up the steps and shut the door to his bedroom behind them. 'I thought it was obvious what he was doing,' Remus said, sitting on his bed and crossing his legs. 'He was flirting with you.'

'Why?' she asked, sitting next to him.

'Cause he thinks you're hot?' Remus suggested with raised eyebrows, talking as if she was slow witted.

She frowned and threw herself down onto her back. 'I'm not,' she muttered. 'Not like the girls he goes out with.'

Remus lay down on his stomach beside her. 'Do you like him?' he asked worriedly.

She shrugged and he bit his lip. 'Just be careful with him, Em,' he warned. 'He's been out with lots of girls…'

'Who've got a lot more experience than me,' she said then turned to look at him. 'Am I abnormal?'

He couldn't help laughing then asking, 'Why?'

'Cause I'm fourteen and I've never even kissed a guy,' she said, looking pained.

Remus opened his mouth then closed it again. 'Well, I've never…kissed a girl, so I must be abnormal too.'

She smiled and turned her head to look at him. 'It's not from lack of chances, Remus,' she admonished him. 'Alice would have been on you like white on rice last year. Now, she'd got the hots for Frank. There's still Mary.'

He rolled his eyes and tugged lightly on the ponytail that was spread across the pillow in front of him. 'I don't think you've been lacking opportunities either,' he teased, grinning down at her. 'James and now Sirius.'

Emma snorted with laughter, making him laugh. 'James was interested for all of two seconds until he caught sight of Lily,' she said. 'She's gorgeous and so nice that I can't even hate her for being so good looking. And Sirius…well, it had to be my turn some time. He's running out of girls now after three years.' She sighed. 'I couldn't kiss him. Not when he's kissed all those other girls. I don't know how to kiss.'

'You're kidding, right?' he asked. 'And I'm supposed to go and kiss girls that have kissed him - "The great tongue"? How do you think I feel?'

'He's supposed to be good,' she said with a giggle and he nodded.

'If you listen to Sirius, he's a God,' he joked and Emma laughed.

There was silence for a few moments then she said, 'We should just snog each other and get it over with.'

He looked at her, unsurprised by her words as the thought had just occurred to him as well.

She turned her head and saw his frown. 'Bad idea?' she asked and his frown deepened.

'Probably,' he said, not sounding sure at all.

Emma watched him for another moment then rolled over onto her side. 'We don't fancy each other,' she said and he shook his head in agreement, ignoring the brief thought that he'd noticed her body earlier.

'We could just…practice on each other,' she suggested, watching him carefully.

'You think we could do that?' he asked, surprised by how much he did want to do this. 'Snog but stay just friends?'

Emma thought for a moment. Could they? She thought Remus was cute but loved him as her friend. Although, there had been a moment when he was changing a few days ago when she looked at him in an entirely different way. They were never embarrassed about dressing around each other, although Emma was more modest now. And she'd never before noticed that he had brown curly hair running from his belly button down into his pants and the glimpse made her stomach squirm quite pleasantly.

'I trust you,' she said softly. 'I wouldn't be embarrassed cause I didn't know what I was doing. I could ask you if I'm doing it right. I couldn't do that with anyone else.'

'Mmm,' he agreed then looked down at her face, eyes sliding involuntarily to her lips. 'We tell each other what we're doing wrong and how to do it better?'

She nodded then watched him consider the idea. 'So?' she asked, blue eyes wide as she ran out of patience. 'Are you going to snog me or what, Lupin?'

Remus smiled then lowered his head a little hesitantly, touching her lips lightly with his before pulling back.

'Well?' he asked and she shrugged.

'Not long enough to tell if it was good or not,' she said, shifting so she was on her stomach next to him. 'I'll try.'

He watched as her face moved closer then her lips were on his. Soft but firm and she pulled away after a few moments. 'This isn't right,' she mumbled and he nodded. 'We're not doing it right. We need to stop mucking around and just do it.'

She sat up and pulled him up as well. 'Alright,' she said, taking a breath. 'Hit me with your best shot, Lupin. Knock my socks off.'

Remus laughed, surprised this didn't feel all that strange. 'Proves I can have fun with her no matter what we're doing,' he thought before he leaned over and tried to do what she'd told him to do.

Lips met and this time, he set about trying to make the most of having a willing practicing partner.

She pulled away and frowned. 'Open your mouth a little this time,' she told him then leaned in again.

'God, you're bossy,' he complained but did as she told him and found this much more satisfactory.

Instead of planting his lips directly on hers, this time he let his lips part a little and took her bottom lip between them, hearing her little noise of surprise. This was much better.

Emma was surprised when he changed tactics but had to admit, his new technique was working. She noticed his eyes were closed and she couldn't seem to keep her own open, enjoying the feeling of his lips. He was lightly kissing her: small, nibbling little kisses that she found herself returning, copying him.

'Open your mouth more,' he mumbled, not taking his lips off hers.

She did and the kiss seemed to deepen, heads tilting so their mouths had better access to each other.

Their mouths moved slowly, but now with growing assurance. Emma felt his hand touch her face, cupping it lightly and couldn't help a little moan of satisfaction. Remus moved, tearing his lips reluctantly away from hers.

'H…how was that?' he asked in a raspy voice.

Emma nodded at him and cleared her throat. 'Good,' she told him. 'Really good.'

He grinned, turning pink. 'You were good too,' he said, looking down. 'You made a noise. Did I do something you didn't like?' He watched as Emma turned bright red. 'What? You have to tell me.'

'You touched my face,' she said, closing her eyes in embarrassment. 'It was nice.'

Remus smiled broadly and she smacked him with a pillow. 'Shut up, Lupin,' she muttered then they both jumped when they heard a knock on the door.

'Dinner, you two!'


	4. Chapter 4

**Told you it would get hotter...still underage so not too hot just yet though. **

**WARNING: Sexual experimentation.**

Chapter Four

'How's that?' she asked a little breathlessly and he smiled.

'Good,' he answered, propping himself up on his elbow. 'I like that thing you did with your tongue.'

She flushed and shook her head. 'We weren't supposed to keep doing this,' she said, sitting up on her bed. 'It was only supposed to be while we were learning.'

'Well, we are still learning,' he said, defending the last four weeks of snogging. 'I don't fancy you, you know.'

'I don't fancy you either,' she retorted.

They were quiet for a moment then she looked at him. 'Which thing with my tongue?'

He grinned and pushed her down onto the bed, leaning over her and kissing her with all the skills they'd mastered over the past month.

After their first session in his room, they decided not to do it again. 'It could get a bit weird,' she said and he agreed.

That lasted almost twenty four hours, their next make out session concentrating on open mouth kissing then Emma flicked her tongue experimentally over his lip, sending what felt like an electric shock shooting through Remus' body. They'd spent most of their free time since shut up in one of their bedrooms, practicing. They'd gotten pretty good as well and much more confident, hands beginning to touch as well - all above the neck but exciting just the same.

'Do that again,' Remus mumbled now against her lips and Emma stroked her tongue lightly over his again as he requested.

He groaned and slid his hands into her hair. The kiss deepened and Remus found himself pressing his body closer to hers. The first time he got excited from their kisses, he'd been embarrassed and had left to go home but now he was more used to the feeling of his body hardening and had discovered how nice it felt to rub that hardness over Emma's leg or hip. He knew she'd noticed - he'd caught her flushing once, her eyes on the front of his pants, but she never stopped him. In fact, she had started to lift her own hips against his, causing a friction that just about made him want to burst.

Emma cupped his face, running her hands over his jaw and feeling the beginning of a rougher texture there. Remus' tongue explored her mouth, stroking over hers and Emma felt like she couldn't breath. Her body was aching, wanting something more. She felt him move, his erection more obvious now as he rubbed over her hip. She liked that he got hard from kissing her - it made her feel powerful.

'I must be doing it properly,' she reasoned then her mind went blank as his teeth scraped over her bottom lip lightly.

'God, Em,' Remus moaned, tearing his lips from hers several minutes later, panting. 'That's so good.'

He pushed his face into her neck, unable to stand the delicious sensations of their lips and tongues duelling any longer without doing something he was certain was forbidden for friends. His lips brushed over her skin and it was Emma that moaned this time, her head tilting to allow him access. Hesitating only a second, he pressed his lips to her neck again then, when she shuddered, he moved. Pressing light kisses up to her jaw, he felt her arm around him tighten, trying to pull him closer. He obliged, shifting so he was lying partly over her.

'Keep doing that,' she whispered and he happily continued, letting his lips brush against the thin skin of her throat.

He moaned along with Emma when his tongue slipped out and experimentally licked the hollow of her throat.

'Jeez, that's fantastic,' she murmured and he smiled, enjoying making her feel good. After a couple of minutes, though, he wanted to be on the receiving end of this kind of attention.

'Can you do it to me?' he asked, raising his head and kissing her lips.

Emma lifted her head off the pillow and pressed a kiss to his throat. Remus groaned a little then rolled over onto his back.

'Em?' he asked and she held herself over him on her arms, and lowered her lips to his neck. She scattered kisses all over his neck and throat, her tongue tasting his skin as he'd done to her.

'Oh, that _is_ fantastic,' he muttered then drew in a sharp breath when she kissed the place where his neck and shoulder joined.

There was a knock on the door and they jumped up, Remus pulling a pillow onto his lap to try and hide the swell of the erection he knew would be obvious.

'Yeah?' Emma called, quickly straightening her hair and wiping her mouth.

Her mother poked her head into the room. 'Your mum wants you home, Remus,' she said, smiling at him. 'Something about a bedroom needing cleaning before you leave tomorrow.'

He groaned, recalling what a mess his room was. He'd be stuck there the rest of the day.

Mrs Jack left with a chuckle, leaving them looking at each other. 'I've seen your room,' Emma said with a little laugh. 'I won't see you until Christmas.'

He laughed and pulled his shoes on. 'So, that's it?' he asked, seeing her bite her lip. 'Guess so,' she murmured. 'We've gotten pretty good, if I say so myself.'

Remus nodded and smiled. 'Ready for Sirius now?' he asked and she shook her head, looking away.

'We'll see,' she said, standing up and stretching. 'See you tomorrow?'

'Sure will,' he said as he stood up.

He hugged her and then kissed her on the cheek. 'Platonic only,' he assured her.

'That was a pretty good summer break, Lupin,' she teased and he grinned.

'It was alright,' he said carelessly then chuckled when she raised her fist threateningly.

'Thanks, Jack,' he murmured and she nodded.

'You too,' she said then waved as he left.

* * *

Fourth year consisted of harder work and, by the end of the year, a few dates for each of them, allowing them to put their summer long experimenting into practice. They didn't kiss again, but talked about their dates with each other.

'Callum can't kiss to save his life,' she moaned, lying on the couch in the common room after her date with the Ravenclaw. 'Even after the third time, he was still slobbering all over me.'

Remus grimaced as he looked at her, adjusting where her feet were laying on his lap then handed her the chocolate he'd been eating. 'Here,' he said. 'I just lost my appetite.'

She chuckled and took the candy, saying, 'If you're eating chocolate, does that mean your date sucked as well?'

'Yep,' he told her, yawning. 'She kissed alright though. Not as good as you.'

'Shh!' she said quickly, looking around.

'I checked,' he mumbled. 'There's no one else here. I'm going up to bed. Catching the train home tomorrow.'

'Mmm,' she said, then made a noise of complaint when he pushed her feet off his lap. 'Come on. You too.'

He pulled her up and wrapped his arms around her from behind, walking her over to the girls dorm as she giggled. He could feel her backside pressed against his groin and his body showed some interest. Backing off, he said good night quickly then lay down in bed, groaning when his cock wouldn't behave.

Sticking his hand down the front of his pants, he stroked himself, rubbing his thumb over the tip then moving his other hand to cup his balls. He moaned in just a minute, feeling the hot, sticky sensation spread over his hand. Finding his wand, he cleaned up then sighed as he thought how it should feel more wrong to imagine his friend while he masturbated.

'She's hot,' he told himself. 'And I spent the summer snogging her. Of course I'm going to think about her sometimes. Especially after that disaster of a date. It doesn't mean anything.'

She _had_ gotten hot - curvier now and fuller in the chest almost overnight. Sirius had shown a lot of interest but Emma was avoiding him, not sure she was ready to deal with the insistent teenager.

* * *

They spent time together as well as with their other friends over the holidays then joined them all at James' house for a party. Sirius winked at Remus as he pulled out the Firewhiskey and set up a game of spin the bottle. He spun first and, of course, got Emma.

'He cursed it to do that,' Remus mumbled to her before Sirius grabbed her and kissed her before she could say a word.

'He _is _good,' she thought as his tongue stroked over hers.

She kissed him back then went bright red when he was pulled off her by James. 'Settle down, Sirius,' he teased. 'Save some for someone else.'

Remus was next and he somewhat grumpily spun the bottle, getting Mary. He sighed inwardly, knowing already that she was a lousy kisser. They continued to play then, three rounds in, Emma got Remus.

'Ooh,' Sirius teased them, unaware that this wasn't new to them.

Remus glared at him then leaned over and kissed Emma, his lips immediately recalling how to fit themselves to hers in the way they liked the most. Despite the fact it had been a year since they last did this, their mouths remembered. The other's watched, surprised by how easily the friends came together. Sirius watched appraisingly and, when the group broke up later, he approached Remus.

'That wasn't the first time you two have done that,' he said and Remus went red.

'We kind of practiced on each other last summer,' he admitted and Sirius grinned.

'I knew you liked each other,' he said but Remus shook his head.

'We don't. Not like that,' he insisted. 'It was only over the summer and it was only because we trusted each other and don't really fancy each other.'

'It sure looked like you fancied each other in there,' Sirius said and Remus frowned.

'It's really not like that,' he said and the other boy smiled.

'So you wouldn't mind if I ask Emma to come up to my room with me?' he asked.

Remus looked startled. 'You can ask,' he said, not very pleased with the idea.

He did ask and to Remus' surprise and irritation, Emma disappeared with the boy. He was a bit distracted, hearing Sirius' stories about what he and girls got up to in his bed. His eyes kept wandering over the the staircase, waiting for them to come back down. Half an hour later, they returned, both a little pink in the face, getting pinker when James and Peter whistled and cat called. Emma disappeared into the kitchen and Remus followed her.

'Are you alright?' he asked, seeing her rubbing at her face. She nodded and he felt a rush of anger towards Sirius. 'Did he hurt you? Force you to do something?'

'No,' she said, lifting her head. 'No. He…he was really sweet, actually. I was just really nervous being with him.'

She let out a long breath then said, 'I'm going home. It's nearly time anyway.'

He nodded, telling her he'd come as well. 'You don't have to…' she began but he shrugged.

'Like you said, James' parents will be home soon and I don't really feel like spending the night here. Besides, your parents would kill me if I didn't walk you home.'

They waved goodbye, Sirius pulling her aside for a moment before she walked out the door. 'Are you alright?' he asked in concern. 'Are you sure I didn't upset you or hurt you…?'

'I'm sure,' she said with a smile. 'I'm just…not quite ready for what you want.'

'A kiss?' he asked and she chuckled.

'More like what your hands were doing while you were kissing,' she told him and he grinned.

'Tell me when you're ready,' he said softly. 'You're a good kisser, Em. I'd like to do it again.'

He kissed her quickly on the mouth then she left with Remus.

* * *

They were quiet on the way home, walking slowly. Remus finally broke the silence, asking, 'What did he want to do?'

'I knew you were listening,' she muttered and under the streetlight, she saw him turn red. 'His hands wandered a bit, that's all. He surprised me and I kind of panicked. We…we never touched like that when we were kissing. Maybe we should have - I might not have freaked out so much tonight.'

He looked at her curiously. 'Where exactly…?'

'Boobs,' she answered, not bothering to wait until he'd asked.

He couldn't help it. His eyes slid down to her chest, trying to imagine what her breast would feel like in his hand.

'Do you want a grope too?' she asked, raising her eyebrow when she saw where his eyes were.

He looked up and went even redder. 'No,' he muttered and she laughed.

'You do so,' she teased, poking him in the ribs. 'Actually, it's not a bad idea. We could do the same as we did when we practiced kissing. Except it would be a bit of groping this time.' He shook his head and she continued. 'How far have you gone with your dates?'

Remus stopped walking and frowned. 'You know how far I've gone. I tell you everything,' he said, starting to walk again. 'I've never tried to…touch anyone like that.'

He frowned and glanced over at her, the idea of trying a bit of groping out with someone he trusted starting to appeal to him. Or was it the idea of trying out a bit of groping with Emma?

'What sort of touching would we be practicing?' he asked after a few minutes silence.

Emma looked over at him and bit her lip. 'Um, well, he tried for the boobs so I guess…'

'That's a bit one sided isn't it?' he asked. 'You're the one getting groped.'

'Well, I could feel you up,' she grinned, looking at his chest. 'You're almost as flat as I am.'

He laughed and again, his eyes fell. 'Not so flat anymore, Jack,' he said, turning pink again.

She smiled and they turned onto their block, seeing the lights off in Remus' house and hers down the street. 'So, we are doing this again?' he asked and she nodded.

'I guess so,' she agreed.

They stared at each other and then Remus said, 'Your parent's weren't expecting you back tonight?'

'Nope,' she said, shoving her hands in her pockets. 'I told them I'd stay at James' or yours. I'm supposed to call them if I need a lift in the morning. They don't worry so much if I'm with you.' She giggled. 'Of course, they don't know that you're about to start groping me.'

'Idiot,' he muttered, walking up the path and letting them into the house.

* * *

'It's so quiet,' she mumbled as they crept towards the staircase, thinking any noise they made would be heard.

Remus had the same thought and stopped before he walked up the stairs. 'I know,' he said, taking her hand and leading her out the back yard.

He unlocked the shed he used for transformations and she walked in. 'God, Lupin,' she gasped softly, seeing the damaged interior.

She turned to look at him in concern and saw his sad face. 'Remus, why didn't you tell me it was this bad?'

'Nothing anyone can do about it,' he muttered, sitting on the single bed his parents put in there, repairing it after he tore it apart each month. She sat down with him and took his hand.

They were quiet for a minute then Emma turned to him. 'Would feeling my boobs up help?'

Remus laughed and looked over at her, seeing her grin. He leaned over and kissed her, letting it grow until they were falling back onto the bed, making out.

'How do you want me to do this?' he asked, dragging his mouth away after a while.

'Just do it while you're kissing me,' she said, her tone slightly annoyed as she pulled his head back down to hers.

'Better,' she thought.

They got completely lost in kissing for a little while then Emma felt Remus' hand creeping slowly over her ribs then lightly cover her breast. She pulled away and pushed him off her.

'Hang on,' she whispered, taking her coat off, leaving her with a thin shirt on.

'Aren't you cold?' he asked and she grinned.

'I doubt I'll be cold long. If I am, you're doing it wrong,' she teased and he laughed, pulling his own jacket off.

'Alright,' she said, staring at him. 'Tell me how far Sirius has gone with girls.'

Remus looked startled. 'Tell me you're not imagining I'm Sirius,' he begged and she smiled.

'No, I'm not,' she told him. 'Actually, I'm not thinking a whole lot of anything when we're doing this.'

Remus smirked and she kicked him lightly. 'I asked because if I do go out with him I want to know exactly what his expectations might be. Don't tell me you don't know.'

He lay down on his back and put his hands behind his head. 'He's gone all the way with one of them,' he told her and saw her mouth drop. 'An older girl. She'd done it before and…' He shrugged.

'Well, I'm not doing that with him,' she muttered, chewing at her fingernail. 'So, he's used to girls that go pretty far?'

Remus nodded. 'I guess,' he said then slapped her hand out of her mouth gently. 'Don't chew your nails, Jack.'

Emma frowned at him but left it out of her mouth as she lay down beside him with a sigh.

'I should just let you screw me and get it over with,' she said then laughed at his alarmed look. 'Relax, Lupin. I'm not going to jump you. Not unless you want me to.'

She wriggled her eyebrows at him then rolled over onto her side, laughing. Remus shook his head at her, then put his arm over her, pulling her closer.

'Are you going to stop talking anytime soon?' he grumbled. 'I want to go to bed and I've still got to feel you up properly. God, a best friend's work is never done.'

Emma giggled, the sound cut off when she kissed him, letting her lips tease his in a way she knew he liked. The thinner layer between them meant they could feel each other's bodies better and, as the kiss deepened, she slid her hand under his shirt. She felt him shiver but took it to be a good shiver. Moving her hand slowly, she flattened it and, when she got to his chest , she could feel his nipple harden under her palm. Frustrated with her position, she shifted uncomfortably.

'Here,' Remus whispered, grabbing her hips and pulling her over so she was lying on top of him.

'Hold on,' he murmured, tugging his shirt off.

She was a little surprised but looked him over. His chest had many scars and she sat up straddling him so she could see him.

'Jesus, Em,' he groaned as he felt her hot sex against his now very hard cock with only their jeans separating them. 'Don't sit like that.'

She slid off him fast and chuckled. 'Sorry,' she said, touching his chest.

She ran her fingers over it, brushing his nipple again. He hissed a little and she stopped.

'No?' she queried and he shook his head.

'Yes,' he breathed. 'Do it again.'

She did, several times then touched it with one finger, circling the hardened nub lightly. 'God,' he muttered under his breath.

'Alright?' she asked and he nodded.

'I want a turn,' he said suddenly, rolling over and pulling her down next to him. He didn't know what it was but he needed to touch her; to hear her moan and know he was making her do it.

He moved so he was partially on top of her, kissing her fast and hard, incredibly turned on now. Emma was startled by his fierce kiss but found herself responding, holding his head to hers as an ache intensified in her lower body. The feeling was a little scary but she didn't want to stop.

She felt his hand slide under her shirt then before she knew it, he was covering her breast. Her nipple hardened immediately and Remus made a desperate noise in his throat. Sliding a leg between hers, he pressed harder against her, hips unconsciously mimicking what he wanted to do. His thumb rubbed over her nipple and she cried out into his mouth then pushed him off her a little as she pulled off her shirt.

Remus looked down and saw a tiny scrap of pink lace wrapped around her chest. He smiled and Emma said, 'What?'

'Nice,' he murmured, touching the lace lightly.

'I can let you wear it one day if you like,' she teased and he laughed before leaning over to kiss her again, his hand cupping her breast.

His thumb made a couple more passes over her nipple then he couldn't stop himself. He slid his hand inside the cup of her bra and felt her bare breast in his hand, moaning along with Emma when he circled her nipple. Their breathing was ragged now and Remus knew if he didn't stop right now, he was going to come in his pants.

'Uncle,' he said, tearing his mouth off hers and sitting up when he used their code word for stop.

'What?' she asked, touching his shoulder but he moved away.

'Don't touch me,' he said roughly. 'Just give me a minute.'

She did and after a few breaths, he turned to look at her. 'Sorry, Em,' he said contritely. 'I was just a bit…worked up.'

She frowned then comprehension hit. Her eyes lowered to the front of his pants and she tried to hide a smile.

'You _do_ fancy me,' she teased and he almost growled.

'No, I don't,' he muttered, pulling his shirt on. 'You've just got nice boobs.'

Emma giggled then yanked her own shirt over her head as well then they made their way back to the house, slipping in quietly and going to separate rooms for the night, both of them sliding their hands into their underwear and relieving the achiness there before they could go to sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

**Thanks for the reviews guys! **

**WARNING: Friends doing each other a small favour! Just friends, mind you! And Sirius gets very lucky (Oral sex warning).**

**R/R, chooks!**

Chapter Five

'Em,' Remus moaned, feeling her mouth moving from his throat to his chest, kissing all over.

'Mmm,' she muttered, then flicked her tongue over a nipple.

Things had gone much further than they'd intended over the past few days, gradually allowing each other more liberties with their bodies. They both knew they shouldn't be doing it, but neither one of them wanted to stop.

Remus wrapped his arms around her and rolled them over so he was over her. 'My turn,' he murmured, kissing down her neck.

He felt goose bumps break out all over her skin as his tongue dipped into the hollow of her throat. With a smile, he undid the front clasp of her bra and parted the cups, kissing over her breast until he could take a nipple in his mouth.

'Jesus,' she moaned, threading her fingers through his hair. 'Remus, that feels really good.'

He grunted agreement, feeling his pants tighten painfully. 'Uncle,' he mumbled, groaning with frustration but knowing he was very close to completely losing control. He wanted desperately to keep going, but this was Emma. He couldn't. They couldn't.

'Keep going,' she whispered, and he looked up at her face.

'We can't,' he said, trying to be sensible while his body screamed, "WHAT!! YOU IDIOT!!".

'I want to touch you,' she said, her pink face reddening further. 'I can feel you and I want to see you. Please?'

Impossibly, his cock hardened even further until he really thought it might burst. 'Sure?' he asked, at the point where she could ask him anything and he'd blindly agree.

She nodded and he lay down and undid his pants, hesitating for a moment then pulled them down a little to free himself, prick practically leaping out of his boxers in anticipation.

'Wow,' she said, staring at him. She looked up at his face and he could see her eyes were wide. 'Are all guys like that?'

He was long, really long, and thick. She looked down at his erection again. He looked smooth and she wanted to touch.

He could feel his face burning and he shrugged. 'Some are smaller,' he said in a choked voice. 'Some are bigger.'

'Jeez, I wouldn't want anyone bigger,' she muttered. 'How the hell do women fit that in them?'

He let out a breath of laughter then she reached out tentatively and touched the tip of him, watching his cock twitch. She touched lightly for a little longer, then closed her hand around him, making him groan.

'You're really hard,' she said softly, giving him a squeeze. 'But you're soft too.' Her finger ran over the tip of his cock and Remus grit his teeth.

'Show me what you like. What you do to yourself,' she said and he clenched his eyes shut.

'This should feel uncomfortable. This should feel weird,' he thought as he put his hand over hers and showed her how to stroke him, then let her do it herself. But it didn't.

After less than a minute, he stopped her, breathing hard.

'Am I doing it wrong?' she asked and he shook his head.

'No,' he panted. 'You're doing it very right. I'm…I'll…you know…'

'Come?' she said and he nodded. 'Isn't that the point?'

Remus looked at her and she leaned over to kiss him. 'I want to do it for you,' she said softly.

'I want to do it for you too,' he found himself saying and she pulled back a little.

'I'll think about it,' she said with a smile. 'But since I have matters in hand right now…' She squeezed his cock and he let out a little squeak.

'Alright,' he whispered, and her hand began to move again, stroking him with long, firm strokes until he was arching up and moaning.

'Em,' he whispered, then thrust up hard towards her hand as he came with a loud cry.

As he tried to catch his breath, Emma reached for her wand to clean her hand and his stomach up. She looked at the white fluid then touched it with her finger.

'Use your wand,' Remus said, his voice a little harsh still.

'Have you ever…tasted it?' she asked and he shook his head.

He looked at her and could see she was curious. 'Do you want to?' he asked and she bit her lip.

'Will you be upset if I do?' she said and he shook his head, surprised he found it a turn on. 'Will you be upset if I don't like it?'

'No,' he answered and she quickly stuck the finger in her mouth.

Remus saw his cock stiffen and he lost the use of his lungs for a moment. She reached for her wand and Cleansed them both, lying down next to him.

'Well?' he asked when she remained silent.

'Strange,' she said softly. 'Um, I don't know what it tastes like but it's not bad.' She kissed him lightly. 'You're tasty, Lupin.'

He chuckled and pulled his pants up. The last thing they needed was for her parents to come home early and walk in on them like this. He checked the time. Mr and Mrs Jack had said they'd be gone until after dinner and it was only four o'clock. Plenty of time to convince Emma to let him to do what he wanted to her now.

'So….' he said, his voice wheedling. 'My turn?'

She frowned a little. 'Come on, Em,' he said softly. 'I let you. What's the problem? Are you embarrassed or worried?'

'I don't know,' she admitted. 'Maybe just a bit nervous.'

Remus shifted, pulling her onto her back as he leaned over her. 'Why don't I just start and then if you really don't want me to, I'll stop,' he told her, touching her face gently. 'Just say "uncle" and I'll stop straight away.'

She nodded and he smiled before he kissed her. As his mouth made its way down her body to her breast, he briefly thought of where this was leading. They'd only ever agreed to an afternoon of kissing. Now, things were going further than either of them ever imagined it would.

His hand slipped down to her skirt as his mouth closed over her nipple, running his hand up her thigh as she moaned. It was coming up to a full moon and he could smell her. He sniffed, breathing deeply. It was a musky smell that made the hairs on the back of his neck stick up and he wanted to drink her in. He glanced up at her face as he moved his mouth to her other breast, seeing the pink stain on her cheeks, her closed eyes and she was biting her lip hard.

She looked beautiful and he felt a twist in his gut as well as a surge in his groin.

His finger traced the elastic of her underwear as his tongue flicked her hard nipple and she made a desperate noise, her hips arching a little. Remus took this as permission to keep going and his finger slipped under her knickers, feeling heat, wet heat that made him moan along with Emma. His lips moved to her neck then her lips.

'Em, show me what to do,' he whispered then kissed her.

He moved his other hand under her skirt and he tugged down her knickers. He pushed up her skirt, her hands stopping him.

'I want to see you,' he said, kissing her neck. 'Please, Em?'

She moved her hands away and he lifted the skirt, looking down at her. She was so tiny that one of his hands almost stretched from one side of her waist to the other. Her skin was cream coloured and she had a little freckle just above where the soft, dark brown curls started. He slid his hand down to cup her cute, little sex and she groaned and parted her legs.

'Fuck,' he muttered then let his finger trace the crease between her folds then dip shallowly between them.

'Yeah,' she breathed and he smiled.

'Higher,' she murmured and he obeyed, moving his finger until he heard her gasp and say, 'There.'

He wriggled his finger experimentally but she shook her head. 'Like this,' she said breathlessly, sliding her finger over his and circling a small, hard bump deeper inside her sex.

'Jesus, Em,' he mumbled, his mouth on her shoulder. 'You're soft. So soft.'

She moaned and her own fingers slipped lower, pushing inside her.

'I want to do it,' he said, pulling her hands out of the way and replacing them with his.

'Wet,' he murmured to himself as he tried to coordinate his movements. 'So tight. Fuck, you feel so good.'

He kissed Emma's neck, making her arch up and tilt her head back. 'Faster,' she demanded and he again did as she told him to do and felt her inner muscles tightening around his fingers.

'God, Remus,' she gasped, gripping his head and pulling his face to hers.

She kissed him hard as he felt her walls pulse around his fingers. She thrust her hips up hard, making soft, whimpering noises into his mouth as her whole body tensed.

'I made her come,' he realised, his heart jumping.

Remus couldn't help his grin or his little laugh as the spasms in her body stopped and Emma relaxed.

'Shut up, Lupin,' she mumbled, pushing him off of her. He chuckled and then realised she wasn't smiling.

'Em?' he asked, frowning.

'Just give me a minute, alright,' she said snappily, rolling away from him and pulling her knickers up before she stood up. Remus was startled by her sudden standoffishness and watched her dress in silence.

'I'll get us a drink,' she muttered, walking out the door hastily.

He sat on the bed, wondering what he'd done wrong then slowly got dressed. When she hadn't come back in five minutes, he wandered down the stairs to see her sitting in the back yard on the swings that they hadn't played on for years.

Unsure whether he was doing the right thing, he walked out to sit on the swing next to her, rocking gently.

'Did I hurt you?' he asked softly, relieved when she shook her head. 'Did I do it wrong?'

'No,' she whispered and she looked over at him, tears in her eyes.

Remus was horrified. 'What did I do, Em?' he asked urgently, stopping the swing still.

'It's not you,' she said, looking down at the ground as a tear escaped. 'It was overwhelming, I guess. I just got a bit freaked out.'

She looked at him again and smiled a closed mouth smile. 'You were perfect. It's me.'

Remus slid off the swing to kneel in front of her, putting his arms around her hips. 'We'll stop this,' he said firmly. 'Our friendship comes first, Jack. I won't put that at risk for a grope.'

Emma looked down at him and the panic and confusion she had been feeling faded. This was Remus. He'd never hurt her. She was safe with him. She put her arms around his neck, linking her fingers.

'Thank you,' she said softly and leaned forward to kiss him.

'I should go home,' he said, unconsciously stroking his thumbs over the top of her ass. 'Let you get some space.'

'Did you like it?' she asked abruptly and he frowned.

'What?' he asked and she turned red.

'Me…jerking you off?' she whispered and he smiled before he could stop it.

'Yeah,' he said. 'I really liked it. Did you like me doing it to you?'

Emma nodded then looked down at her feet when she said, 'It was better than when I do it to myself.'

He made a little noise and closed his eyes at the thought of her masturbating. 'Do you think of me when you do it?' he asked, not sure where the question had come from. 'Or Sirius?'

'Remus,' she objected. 'You can't ask me that.'

'Sure I can,' he said and she bit her lip.

'Who do you think about?' she countered and he smiled.

'You first,' he demanded and she sighed.

'Yes,' she admitted. 'I think of what we did that day sometimes.'

He grinned and she put her foot on his chest and pushed him over, giggling at him when he fell on his ass. He almost growled and grabbed her arm, pulling her off the swing and she landed on him. He fell back and she lay on top of him.

'Answer me now,' she said softly and he put a hand on either side of her head.

'You are as hot as hell, Emma,' he said seriously. 'Of course I think of you.'

She smiled and he kissed her. When he pulled away, he said, 'I still don't fancy you.'

'Of course not,' she said, matter of factly. 'I don't fancy you either.'

She kissed him again, letting it linger longer now, oblivious to the growing dark. 'We should go inside and get some food,' he said, running his hands down her back to her ass. 'Nice ass.'

She laughed and stood up, stretching. Holding out a hand, she was nearly pulled over when he took it and stood. They walked back to the house and he slipped his hand into hers.

'Hey, Jack,' he said softly. 'It was better for me too. Than when I do it myself.'

He saw her smile then they ordered a pizza for dinner.

* * *

Fifth year saw Sirius making some headway with Emma. Towards the end of the year, Remus frowned when he saw her emerging from behind his closed curtains one day. 'Oh, hi,' she said with a smile, brushing her hair off her face.

Sirius walked out behind her and grinned at Remus. 'Hey, Moony,' he said, then pulled on Emma's hand. 'Come on, Em. I'm starving.'

'Yeah, I'll see you down there, ok?' she said and he shrugged, walking out the door.

She sat on Remus' bed and watched him change his shirt. 'So, what were you two up to or don't I want to know?' he asked.

Emma giggled and lay back on the mattress. 'Just kissing,' she said, stretching.

He lay down beside her and propped himself up on an elbow. 'Was it good?' he asked and she looked startled.

'You're interested in whether Sirius is a good kisser?' she said then grinned. 'I don't think he swings that way, Lupin, but you could try…'

'Nut,' he muttered and she laughed.

'Yes, he's good,' she said.

Before he could stop himself, he asked, 'Better than me?'

Emma's eyes widened and she frowned. 'Remus…'

'Sorry,' he mumbled. 'I probably shouldn't ask you that, huh?'

Emma was still frowning then said, 'It's been months since we did anything. I've almost forgotten…'

Before her sentence was out, his lips were on hers and he was kissing her hard. Emma yelped a little in surprise then found herself responding, her mouth opening to him. Remus pulled her closer, pressing their bodies together and she felt heat surge through her. When they were both breathless, she pulled away and stared at him in confusion.

'We aren't supposed to do that here,' she hissed, sitting up and putting a trembling hand to her mouth. 'Remus, we're helping each other during the holidays for this…so we aren't so shy or nervous on dates.'

'I know,' he muttered, sitting up as well and running a hand through his hair. 'Sorry. I just…'

He didn't know what was wrong with him. He'd been able to smell Sirius' scent on her and wanted it off; to replace it with his own.

'You're not going out with anyone,' she said, putting her hand in his. 'That's what's wrong. You need to go out and do some snogging.'

Remus chuckled and stood up, pulling her with him. 'Yeah, that's it,' he agreed.

'And I know just the girl,' she said thoughtfully. 'Kelly from Hufflepuff was asking about you the other day. You should ask her to Hogsmeade next weekend. I hear she doesn't stop at kissing.'

He shook his head, although tempted. 'Are you going with Sirius?' he asked and she nodded.

'He asked,' she told him.

'Have you…you know, gone far with him?' he asked, annoyed that he felt an unpleasant sensation in his stomach waiting for her to answer.

'Not as far as we did,' she replied, turning a little pink. 'Come on, Lupin. I'm starving.'

'Snogging all day will do that,' he teased and she smacked him on the ass.

'Smart ass,' she retorted then squealed when he grabbed her and threw her all too easily over his shoulder and walked down the stairs.

* * *

Emma bullied him until he asked Kelly to go with him. They wandered around, Kelly dragged him to Madame Puddifoots, a notorious café for couples, for lunch. He got a surprised when he saw Sirius and Emma there, waving at them before Kelly took his hand and led him to a table across the room. He tried to concentrate on what she was saying to him and was doing a decent job until he saw Sirius touch Emma on the face, stroking a finger down her cheek. Emma smiled at him and he leaned over and kissed her. Not a 'I'm in public" peck on the cheek, but a "Can't wait till we're in private" snog that made Remus' stomach twist suddenly.

He looked away, drinking his tea. 'Jack's right,' he thought with a slight frown. 'I need to kiss someone other than her for a while.'

He looked at Kelly, who was admiring the décor. She was cute, blonde taller and heavier than Emma.

'So?' he asked himself. 'Stop comparing girls you're kissing to Emma.'

He reached over and took Kelly's hand, smiling when she did. By the time they'd finished their lunch, he'd gotten up the courage to kiss her then found himself snogging her every bit as inappropriately as Sirius and Emma had been.

'Moony's got his act together finally,' Sirius commented as he and Emma left.

She turned around and saw him kissing Kelly, his hand cupping the girl's face.

'That's how he kisses me,' she thought.

A strangely hollow sensation in her chest surprised her with its intensity and she rubbed at herself. She looked away, not liking seeing her friend making out.

'Alright?' Sirius asked and she nodded and smiled, taking his offered hand.

'Get over it,' she told herself. 'Remus is a friend. You're with Sirius.'

She wasn't kidding herself. Sirius never remained interested in a girl for long but she was having a good time with him and he was an amazing kisser.

* * *

They walked back to Hogwarts. Once in his room, Sirius casting a Silencing spell around his bed then pulling her to him and kissing her hard and fast. He didn't waste any time, sliding his hand up her shirt to cover her breast, circling her nipple with his thumb. Emma made a little noise against his lips and arched up. Sirius took that as permission to go further and pulled down the cup of the bra, pushing up her shirt and taking her nipple in his mouth. Their shirts were quickly thrown down on the bed and Emma's bra followed. Sirius kissed down to her belly button then moved his hands to undo her jeans. She allowed it then gasped as his hand slipped inside her underwear.

'S…Sirius,' she stammered then moaned a little when his finger slid between the folds of her sex and immediately found her clit.

'Let me make you feel good, Em,' he cajoled and she bit her lip, almost unable to talk as his fingers slid inside her and his thumb kept making firm circles over her clit.

'Jesus, he really knows what he's doing,' she thought then he flicked her clit and suddenly she shattered, crying out and arching up.

She came back down off her high and saw him grinning at her.

'Ok?' he asked softly and she nodded, smiling at him and saying a silent thank you to Remus. She'd never have let Sirius get near her if he hadn't have helped her first.

'I suppose you want me to reciprocate?' she teased, rolling over on top of him.

His hands fell down to her ass and pulled her hard to him. 'Mmm,' he murmured, kissing her. 'That would be the polite thing to do, I suppose.'

She giggled and kissed his chest, flicking over his nipples with her tongue. She undid his fly, feeling a little nervous. They hadn't gone this far before. Sirius pulled his jeans down and his cock sprang out. He was about the same length as Remus but thinner, her hand almost able to curl all the way around him. Letting out a sharp breath, he put his hand over hers and helped her stroke him. Groaning, he grabbed her other hand and moved them to his balls.

'Squeeze, just lightly,' he told her and she did, rolling each one between her fingers then cupping the sac.

'Jeez, you've done this before,' he moaned and she giggled. 'Have you ever given head?'

She looked surprised and her hand slowed down. 'No,' she said, looking at his cock in her hand and resuming her stroking.

'Want to?' he asked with a grin and she bit her lip.

'You don't have to,' he said quickly. 'What you're doing is just fine.'

'Could I just…do a little?' she said, not sure if she was doing the right thing but curious.

'You can do whatever you want, baby,' he told her. 'As long as you don't bite.'

She laughed then stroked him hard, making his eyes close and head fall back. Lowering her head, she flicked her tongue over the tip of his cock and he let out a breath. She did it a few more times, than ran her tongue more firmly over him.

'Put your mouth around me,' he begged and she did, closing it around the tip.

'Fuck!' he said loudly and his hand moved to her head. Emma sucked lightly and he moaned, gripping her hair tight. Her hand was still stroking and she sucked again harder and he told her to move.

'Now, Em,' he gasped and she sat up, watching his face tense and he cried out as he came.

While he panted, trying to catch his breath, she grabbed his wand and waved it, cleaning them up. Sirius caught her hand and pulled her down to lie next to him.

'You are amazing,' he mumbled, kissing her hard.

Emma rolled over onto her stomach, suddenly a little self conscious lying there half dressed. He must have seen something in her face and he rolled over onto his side. 'What?' he asked softly. 'Did I push you into that? Was it too soon for you?'

'No,' she said, unable to even figure out herself what was suddenly wrong with her; why she suddenly felt like she was doing something wrong by being here. 'Just tired, I think.'

'Come and give me a smooch,' he said with a grin, pulling her over onto him and kissing her.

It started off playfully but soon, he rolled them so he was over her and the kiss grew. He kissed her slow and soft and deep and it sent a shiver through her. He finally pulled back when they couldn't breathe and smiled at her.

'We should go to dinner,' he said, his voice hoarse. 'Before I start getting ideas again.'

Emma nodded, smiling when she saw his partially renewed hard on. They dressed then opened the curtains, catching James and Peter about to walk out.

'Hey,' James said with a sly glance at Sirius. 'We were wondering when you'd emerge.'

Emma flushed but Sirius laughed and put his arm around her, his hand resting on the top of her ass cheek.

'We got hungry,' he said then looked around. 'Where's Remus?'

Peter joined James in the smirking contest now. 'He's "walking" around the grounds with Kelly,' he told them and Sirius chuckled.

Emma smiled, surprised at the acid like feeling in her gut. They walked down to the Dining Hall, catching Remus kissing Kelly in the entry foyer. Not just a peck - a full on make out session with Kelly pressed up against the wall.

Emma frowned, feeling actual pain shooting through her at the sight. 'What the hell is that?' she wondered.

James called out to Remus and the couple broke apart, their faces pink. Remus grinned at them until he saw Emma then his smile faded a little.

'Shit,' he thought, not sure why it bothered him that Emma had obviously seen him and Kelly.

She smiled at him and he couldn't help but notice it was a poor attempt. She walked through to the Dining Hall and the other's followed. He said a thank you and see you later to Kelly then made his way to the Gryffindor Table.


	6. Chapter 6

**Lots of sexual fooling around. Enjoy!**

Chapter Six

'Are you mad at me?' Remus asked a few weeks later as he and Emma were walking to their Ancient Runes test area.

She looked over at him and shook her head. 'Nope,' she told him, smiling.

He noticed that, yet again, it hadn't reached her eyes. 'Jack, if I've done something wrong…?'

'You haven't,' she said, stopping in her tracks. 'I don't know what's wrong with me.' She sighed and looked up at him. 'Let's just get this exam done.'

'Is this because you and Sirius aren't seeing each other anymore?' he asked and her face hardened a little.

She'd caught Sirius flirting pretty heavily with a Fourth Year. While she didn't care about the flirting, it was the touching and his attitude she didn't like and she called their fling off.

'No,' she said firmly. 'I don't like sharing the guy I'm dating but I never really thought Sirius was a long term prospect or anything.'

They reached the room and found their desks were next to each other.

'You've just been a bit…quiet lately,' he whispered, leaning over to talk to her.

'I'm surprised you noticed,' she said, her temper flaring a little. 'You don't move your tongue out of Kelly's mouth long enough to see what's going on around you.'

He frowned and sat back in his chair, startled by her outburst.

'God,' Emma muttered, rubbing her forehead. 'Sorry. I'm just not sleeping much with exams and I'm cranky.'

Remus watched her, knowing that although she probably had been worrying about the exams, that wasn't why she was so snappy. He knew her too well to not know when she was lying to him. They'd hardly spent any time together in the last couple of weeks but between the people they were seeing and exams, that wasn't really surprising. But the slight chill she was emitting was unusual and he wanted to get to the bottom of it. The teacher arrived just then and the exam began. Emma snuck off quickly afterwards and he resigned himself to having to try and catch her when they went home.

* * *

Emma avoided Remus on the trip home. She saw him when she went to the toilet, standing in the hall with Kelly, talking quietly. Kelly looked unhappy but Emma didn't hang around to find out why - turning and heading back to her carriage with the other Gryffindor girls. Two days passed and on the third, Mrs Jack pulled her daughter aside after breakfast.

'Have you and Remus had a fight?' she asked and Emma shook her head.

'No,' she said. 'Why?'

Her mother made a face and let out a disbelieving laugh. 'For the last sixteen years, if he hasn't been here, you've been at his place,' she said. 'I haven't seen him at all. You've not been around there. What's going on?'

'Nothing,' she said, turning away. 'I've been busy. I'll go see him today.'

She left the house and wandered down to the park they used to play at when they were small. She swung on the tyre swing for a while, thinking, then twisted it around until she couldn't tighten it anymore. Lifting her feet, she let it spin back, going faster and faster until it stopped and she felt a little sick.

'Should I stay back?' came a male voice. 'Are you going to spew?'

Emma looked up, still dizzy. 'I had eaten a whole bag of candy,' she said in her defence, having thrown up on his pants several years ago after doing this. 'You should have known better than to dare me to spin on the swing.'

Remus chuckled and sat down next to her on the swing, to her complaint. 'It really isn't big enough for two teenagers,' she told him as he squeezed in beside her.

'It's fine,' he said, almost on her lap. 'You're the size of a well built flea.'

He looked at her, faces close to each other. 'Hi,' he said softly.

'Hi yourself,' she said with a closed mouth smile.

They sat silently for a few minutes, letting the tyre swing circle slowly.

'Emma, are we still friends?' he asked and she nodded.

'Of course we are,' she murmured, looking down at their feet as she got a bit teary. 'I'm sorry, Lupin. I don't know what's wrong with me lately. Puberty, I guess.'

He bit his lip, feeling surprisingly upset. 'That's not it, Em,' he said quietly. 'Please tell me. If I've done something, let me make it up to you.'

'You haven't done anything,' she said, trying to extract herself from the tyre, not easy since their legs seemed to have knotted together.

He clamped his legs together, trapping hers between them. 'No,' he said firmly. 'You're not running away this time, Jack. Tell me what's going on in that pretty head of yours.'

She stopped struggling and stared at him with a frown. 'Don't let Kelly hear you say that,' she mumbled. 'I hear she's the jealous kind.'

'Pot calling the kettle black,' she thought to herself.

'Kelly can think what she likes,' he said casually, but watching her closely thinking he may have just figured out what was wrong. 'I broke up with her on the train.'

Emma looked at him. 'Did you?' she asked then looked away as she tried to hide how happy she was about that. 'Why? You two looked pretty into each other.'

'Once I got used to the making out, I realised we didn't have a single thing to talk about,' he told her, unable to stop his heart jumping a little at the thought that she might have been jealous. 'Not like us.'

'She was a good kisser?' Emma asked, chewing the inside of her mouth.

'Yeah,' he admitted. 'Pretty good. Sirius?'

She glanced over at him and nodded. 'How…how far did you go with her?' she asked hesitantly and his face went a little pink.

'Will you tell me how far you went with Sirius?' he countered and she nodded.

They jumped when they heard a squeal and turned to see three children running for the swings.

'My parents are going out,' he told her as they untangled their legs. 'Come to my place. I don't think this is a conversation for a public area anyway.'

He grabbed her arm and hauled her up. They walked the block to his house then made some sandwiches and took them to his room with a soft drink each. Drawing out lunch, they talked about anything but what was on their minds. Remus took their plates away, putting them on his desk then settling himself on his bed.

'Alright,' he said, deciding he was ready to hear how far she went with his friend. 'Tell me.'

She clenched her jaw, wondering if it would hurt more to hear what he'd done with Kelly or to tell him what she'd done with Sirius.

'He's not my boyfriend,' she told herself. 'I don't want him to be my boyfriend.'

She stood up and sat next to him, taking a deep breath. 'I went down on him,' she said, the words tumbling out of her mouth.

Remus felt a stabbing pain in his chest and tried not to let it show on his face. 'You did?' he asked.

'Not properly,' she said hastily. 'He asked me to while I was…you know, and I thought I'd try.'

'What did you do?' he asked and she frowned.

'You want details?' she asked and he nodded, not sure why he did.

Emma closed her eyes then said in a rush, 'I licked the tip of his cock then I sucked it a couple of times then I moved cause he came. Happy now?'

She opened her eyes and forced herself to look at him. His face looked tense but he nodded.

'Kelly gave me a head job,' he told her abruptly. 'Pretty similar to what you did actually. Not a full one. Just a bit of a lick as she was jerking me off.'

Emma stared at him, biting her lip hard, then she said, 'Did you…do anything to her?' 'Not like that,' he said quickly. 'Just, you know, what we did last summer.'

'That's all Sirius did too,' she said.

They were quiet for long moments, each trying to work out how exactly they felt about what they'd just heard.

'Were you mad because I was fooling around with Kelly?' Remus asked suddenly and Emma frowned.

'I don't know,' she admitted. 'Maybe.'

She was silent for several moments then added, 'I didn't like seeing you kissing her the same way you kissed me - your hand on her face…you do that with me. I don't know why it bothered me so much. It just did.'

Remus reached out and took her hand in his. 'I didn't like you seeing me with her,' he confessed. 'I felt like I was doing something wrong.'

He frowned. 'I hated seeing Sirius' curtains shut, knowing you were in there with him. I hated seeing him touching you.'

They looked at each other, their faces confused and worried. 'I don't fancy you, Em,' he said softly, although not so sure anymore 'I don't. You're my friend.'

'I know,' she said, nodding. 'I don't fancy you but…I don't want anyone else to fancy you either.'

Quiet. Then Remus leant over and kissed her quickly. 'She asked me to go down on her,' he said softly. 'She asked me to have sex with her. That's why I broke up with her.'

He pushed her back onto the bed and held himself over her, his face revealing his insecurity. 'I didn't want to do it with her. I wanted to do it with you. I want you to be my first.'

Emma gave him a smile then reached up and pulled his head down to hers, kissing him.

For the first time, they just kissed. Not practicing, not pretending it was anything else than what it was - them wanting to kiss each other.

It felt like hours that they kissed, slowly, deeply, tasting every crevice of each other's mouths. Hands moved over each other with no hesitation. Remus finally tore his lips from hers - only to pull her shirt off and let her do the same to him. He kissed her again, then his mouth trailed down her throat, her tiny moans the most exciting thing he'd ever heard. His fingers quickly undid her bra, pulling it off as his mouth closed around a nipple, making her cry out softly. As he teased her nipples until they were painfully hard, Emma's hand moved to cup his bulge then she pulled down his zip, sliding her hand inside. He groaned as she stroked him as best she could then lifted his head and shifted. Undoing the fly completely, he slid his pants and boxers down his legs and off, watching her face carefully. Emma's hands moved and she undid her own fly, lifting her butt so she could pull them off.

This was the first time they'd been completely naked with each other and they took a few moments to look each other over.

'You're beautiful, Em,' he said softly, running his hands up her legs, over her ribs to her shoulders.

'Remus,' she whispered. 'I don't think I'm ready to go all the way.'

'That's alright,' he assured her with a smile. 'We'll stop whenever you want. Promise.'

She smiled and pushed him over onto his back. 'My turn to play then,' she teased and he chuckled.

Her lips moved over his neck, biting lightly and making him growl. 'Down, boy,' she mumbled and felt his smile.

It had been a year since they did anything like this and they were both curious about the changes in each other's bodies. She noticed Remus' shoulders had broadened and his jaw felt rougher. He had more scars than she remembered and she kissed a long one over his ribs. She made her way down his body, her hand drifting between his legs and wrapping around his cock. Stroking firmly, she felt him tense when she kissed the skin over his hip.

'Em,' he murmured, putting his hand on her head. 'Don't do it because you think I want it. Don't do it unless you want to.'

She nodded then spent a little more time exploring, touching him all over then experimentally licked him. He tasted familiar and she quickly closed her mouth over him. Remus gasped then gripped her hair and the bed, tearing the sheet off. He watched as Emma slid her mouth further over his shaft, seeing how much of him she could take. She circled her tongue around him as she moved her lips up and down. 'Jeez, Em,' he moaned, then pushed her head out of the way.

He wrapped his hand over hers and pumped it faster for a few seconds before he arched up, crying out as he came.

It took a few minutes for him to breathe normally again, rolling over to face her when he could.

'Damn it, Jack,' he swore. 'I wanted to do it to you first.'

She smiled and reached for his wand to clean up. 'There's time,' she told him, casting the spell. 'We've got six weeks off.'

'Shh!' Remus said suddenly, sitting up. 'Shit!'

He heard a door close downstairs after a pop of an apparition. 'Mum and dad.'

They jumped up, pulling pants on hastily. Remus scooped up her shirt and threw it to her, yanking on his own.

'Where's my bra?' she hissed and he looked around, unable to see it.

'I can't see it anywhere,' he whispered then heard a knock on his door.

They threw themselves down, trying to look casual as Remus called out, 'Yep!'

His father opened the door and smiled. 'Hello, Emma,' he said. 'Wondered when we'd see you again. Remus, your mother wants you to try on some clothes. Now, please.' 'Ooh, a fashion show,' Emma said, grinning as she stood up. 'Can't wait.'

Mr Lupin chuckled and let the girl past then turned back to Remus, who was amazed at how cool she was considering his parents almost caught her with her mouth around his dick. 'Come on then. Don't keep them waiting.'

He seemed to get distracted for a moment then waved Remus out. 'Go on,' he said then, as his son trudged downstairs, he slipped into his room. He crouched beside the bed and tugged on the familiar looking bright pink lace that he'd caught a glimpse of a minute ago. It was stuck between the mattress and the bed head and as he pulled on it, he hoped it wasn't what he thought - his hopes dashed when he pulled out a pink lace bra.

'Shit,' he mumbled with a frown then put it back, not sure what he was going to do about this development.

* * *

He waited until Remus had gone to bed then knocked lightly on his open door. Remus had a book opened but lying across his chest as he stared up at the ceiling, thinking. He turned his head and smiled at his father, who came in and shut the door.

'What's up?' Remus asked.

Mr Lupin sighed and reached under the mattress, pulling out the bra and holding it up. Remus' smile faded and his face kind of froze.

'Um,' he said as he sat up, frantically trying to think of a reason, other than the truth, as to why he'd have a bra in his room.

'Don't bother trying to think of excuses,' Mr Lupin said. 'Your mother cleaned this room just before you came home and this is the first day Emma has been here.'

Remus felt his face reddening. 'So, how long has this been going on?' he asked. 'I thought I heard you were seeing some girl at school?'

'I was,' Remus said quietly, not wanting to tell his father about his and Emma's arrangement. 'Em and I aren't going out. We were just mucking around…'

'Sex is not something to take lightly, Remus,' he admonished and Remus quickly said, 'We haven't had sex.'

His father was silent for a moment then said, 'But you've gone far enough that clothes haven't remained on. That's far enough for us to need to have a conversation.'

Remus closed his eyes and groaned. 'Dad, they taught us Contraceptive spells and that sort of thing…' he said.

'I know,' the man said, looking at the floor. 'And trust me, I'd rather be anywhere but here having this conversation with you but I need to know that you understand what a big thing this is. Not just physically, but emotionally.'

He looked up at his son. 'You and Emma have been friends for so long. Sex complicates things, son. I'd hate to see a friendship I know you value highly ruined because you both let things go a bit too far one day.'

He shifted a bit uncomfortably. 'I know you're at the age where you're getting very curious and it's easy to get carried away. Sex and…everything that comes with it, feels good but you and Emma could pay a high price for that pleasure. It's hard to stay friends once you've started to get physically involved.'

'We both want to do it,' Remus said. 'I feel more comfortable with Emma. She wouldn't…laugh or anything cause I don't know what to do.'

His face burned but he continued. 'And Emma feels the same. We trust each other. We didn't just jump each other one day, you know. It didn't just happen. We talked about this and made a decision that we wanted to…try this with each other before we did it with anyone else.'

Mr Lupin frowned. 'Remus, your first time…I'm assuming you haven't…'

'No, dad,' he said. 'I haven't had sex.'

'But you've come close?' he asked, reading his son's carefully chosen words correctly. 'And you have participated in other sexual acts?'

Remus closed his eyes. 'Dad, I'm sorry but that's private,' he said.

He opened his eyes again and saw his father looking at him with a strange look on his face. 'Well, at least you have some respect for Emma's privacy,' he said softly. 'Look, Remus. I know how much you care for Emma and I know you don't think you're doing any harm by…fooling around like this but I'm telling you, neither you or Emma are ready for the possible consequences of a sexual relationship - particularly if you decide this is a casual relationship.'

He stood up. 'Neither of you are of age and, although it's not a crime, it's also not encouraged. And I would like for the two of you to wait until you are at least of age before taking this step with anyone.'

He put his hands in his pockets and said, 'Remus, I love Emma like she was my own and I don't want to see either of you hurt, and that is why we have a new rule. When she visits here, there will be no more closed doors, and she is not allowed over when we aren't here, nor are you allowed at her house unless her parents are home.'

Remus opened his mouth to argue but his father got in first.

'It is that or we cannot allow Emma over any more,' he told him, his tone final. 'I cannot ban you from having sex with someone but I can try to prevent it long enough for you to be older and wiser. Is that understood?'

'Yes,' Remus muttered, frowning.

'If you truly want your first time with Emma then you'll wait until you're really ready,' Mr Lupin said softly. 'There should be love, Remus. Trust is important, you're right, but…sex is a big deal. Feelings, emotions become more intense when you begin to get physical and you can get in deeper than you think you are. Staying just friends would be hard.'

Remus bit his lip, knowing that this was already starting to happen.

'You're getting confused already, aren't you?' Mr Lupin said, reading his son correctly. 'You're not sure how you're feeling?'

Remus shrugged then looked up at him. 'I'm fine, dad,' he said. 'Everything's fine. I'll do what you want. No closed doors.'

His father gave him a closed mouth smile and left the room, leaving Remus to fall back on the mattress, his father's comments weighing heavily on his mind.


	7. Chapter 7

**Sprung!! God, how embarrassing is it to get caught by your parents? A little more sex stuff this chappie but Remus makes a startling discovery that could end his friendship.**

Chapter Seven

'Dad knows what we were doing yesterday,' Remus said the next day, sitting down on the roundabout next to Emma. 'He found your bra.'

'Yeah, I know,' she said in a low voice, kicking at the ground. 'Your mum rang mine.'

'Shit,' he mumbled, then reached over to take her hand. 'Did you get in trouble?'

'Not really,' she said, shaking her head. 'Just a lecture on how I'm too young to be thinking about sex and that I couldn't possibly know what I'm getting into. And that, although they love you and think you're wonderful, that we aren't in a relationship and shouldn't be considering doing this together because it'll ruin our friendship - and my reputation apparently.'

'Must have been reading from the same parenting manual as my dad,' he muttered. 'Sounds pretty much word for word what he said.'

They were quiet for a few minutes, watching the younger children play on the swings. 'No more closed doors at my place,' he said softly.

'Nor mine,' Emma told him, then turned to look at him. 'Maybe they're right. Maybe we are way too young.'

'Do you feel like we're too young?' he asked and she shrugged.

'I don't know,' she admitted. 'Sometimes I feel like a kid, other times I feel really old.'

She linked her fingers with his. 'I wanted to keep going though. Even though I don't think I'm ready to go all the way, I wanted to try some other things with you.'

'We still can,' he said, turning his body towards hers. 'We could sneak into the shed sometimes.'

She frowned. 'I suppose,' she said, still looking downcast.

Remus looked at her then put his arm around her shoulders. 'From the looks of that face, anyone would think you fancied me, Emma Jack,' he teased and she laughed softly.

'Keep dreaming, Lupin,' she retorted, poking him in the ribs.

He chuckled and kissed her on the cheek before standing up. 'Hang on,' he told her, then grabbed the handles and started to run, turning the roundabout until he couldn't keep up with it anymore then he jumped on, laughing with Emma as they got dizzier and dizzier.

* * *

They didn't have any privacy for weeks, their parents ensuring they found plenty of reasons to check up on them when they were in their bedrooms - door wide open. Remus managed to sneak a couple of kisses, pulling apart quickly when they heard footsteps.

'This is ridiculous,' he muttered, running a hand over his head as he heard his mother's footsteps coming down the hall.

Emma wiped her mouth and tried to look as though she hadn't just had her tongue down her son's throat when Mrs Lupin poked her head in the room on the pretence of seeing if they wanted something to eat.

'Em, I want to be alone with you,' he mumbled once she'd left. 'I want to do to you what you did for me.'

Her body tingled and she felt an ache between her legs. She'd done nothing but think about him going down on her since she'd done it to him.

'I thought of a way,' she said softly. 'You have a transformation coming up. Go to the shed earlier than usual - tell them you feel tired and want to sleep for a while before the change. I'll meet you there and we can just…be alone for a while. I'll leave before you change.'

'No,' he said firmly, crossing his arms over his chest. 'No, Em. I won't put you at risk like that.'

'You won't be,' she insisted. 'I'll be gone before you change.'

He stared at her, sorely tempted by the thought of them being alone together. 'I'll think about it,' he mumbled then heard his dad's footsteps.

'Oh, for God's sake,' he growled then stood up, pulling Emma with him. 'Let's go out. I'm sick of being spied on.'

* * *

They passed his father, Emma saying goodbye and they went to the park. 'Hey,' he said, grabbing her arm as they got closer. 'Come in here.'

He dragged her over until they were behind some large trees.

'What?' she asked then made a noise of understanding when his hands cupped her head and he kissed her.

Emma heard him moan when her lips parted and soon, her breathing become ragged. She wrapped her arms around his neck and felt his move around her waist, holding her as close as he could to his body.

'Em,' he murmured, tearing his lips off hers to kiss her neck. 'We are getting really good at this.'

'Mmm,' she moaned as he nipped at her throat, pushing the shoulder of her shirt aside so he could run his tongue over her collar bone.

Emma's hands crept up under his shirt and he groaned as they brushed over his nipples.

'Jeez, I reckon I could come in my pants right now,' he whispered then hissed as she pinched a nipple.

'Go on,' she said, a dare in her voice.

One hand fell to his fly and pulled down his zip, shoving her hand inside his pants. 'Em,' he said a little shakily but let out a shuddering breath when her hand closed around him. 'God, Em, are you sure?'

She nodded, pushing his further back into the shrubbery. 'Just be quiet, for Merlin's sake,' she whispered, then pushed him up so his back was against a tree.

Remus undid his button and then kissed her as she began to stroke his cock inside his underwear.

'This isn't going to take long,' he mumbled against her lips then kissed her until he let out a long moan a minute later, pressing his lips against hers hard.

Emma felt warm liquid spurt across her hand and as she felt his erection disappearing, she wiped it off on his underwear.

'Sorry,' she whispered as she did up his fly again. 'We can't use magic out here.'

He nodded, looking a little wobbly.

Emma turned around to walk back out into the open but he grabbed her wrist, stopping her. 'Where do you think you're going?' he said softly, pulling her back to him. 'It's your turn now.'

Before she could object, he had his hand under her skirt and it was sliding inside her underwear.

'Jesus, Remus,' she gasped then drew in a sharp breath when she felt his finger searching for then finding her clit.

He rubbed his finger over the little bump and she felt her body clench.

'Oh,' she breathed, closing her eyes and clinging tightly to Remus' shoulders so she wouldn't fall.

Smiling, he did it again then shifted, sliding a finger inside her and letting his thumb take over circling her clit.

'R…Remus,' she moaned, rocking her hips against his fingers. Her breathing was fast and, when he kissed her, she felt her knees buckle as she came.

* * *

'You smell so good,' he whispered as she came back to earth, his face nuzzling her neck. Not just her perfume - her scent, her arousal was making him dizzy and he suddenly craved a taste of her.

She smacked his hand, which was still down her underwear and he chuckled, pulling it out. He looked at her as he raised it to his mouth and licked his fingers. Emma's mouth fell open and she felt a surge of lust that made her knees tremble again.

'You taste good too,' he murmured and her face flushed. A wave of raw need swept over him and he shook violently. 'I'll do it. Tomorrow night. Come to the shed an hour before dark and I'll be waiting.'

He trembled again, thinking of what he wanted to do to her. His erection had returned when he tasted her and he felt an almost overpowering, primal urge to pull her to the ground and slam himself inside of her.

Confused and a little frightened by the strong urge that made him shake, he stepped back. Emma, too, was surprised by the thrill of fear that ran through her suddenly.

'This is Remus,' she told herself. 'I don't need to be frightened of him.'

His eyes were dark, almost black and the obvious desire there startled her. 'I should go,' he said now, sounding almost puzzled. 'I told dad I'd be back before dark.'

She nodded and he took a deep breath, trying to get himself under some control. Stepping forward, he kissed her lightly, trying not to breathe in that scent; that scent that suddenly had him wanting to be buried deep inside her.

'What the hell is happening?' he wondered as he turned and walked away, trying not to look back at her.

* * *

He was exhausted the next day, resting as much as possible. A couple of hours before dark, he told his parents he was going to his shed.

'I'm too tired,' he told them. 'I don't want to fall asleep. I'm getting a bit big to carry to the shed.'

They locked him in and he lay there, anticipation making him edgy. He was already aroused, his erection throbbing uncomfortably, and he was pacing the room like an animal. He felt as though every nerve, every muscle was on alert, waiting for…

Remus stopped in shock. 'Mating,' he thought, standing stock still. 'I want to mate. No. The wolf wants to mate.'

A surge of lust bent him over at the waist, his shaking hand reaching out to hang onto the wall. This was the first time he'd felt like this; like the wolf was taking him over - while he was still in human form; before night fall. And it was sure of what it wanted; what it needed - Emma.

'Emma can't come here,' he thought desperately. 'Not when I feel like this.'

For the first time in his life, Remus was certain that, if Emma arrived tonight, he'd hurt her. He would not be able to control himself.

'Jesus,' he moaned, curling himself up into a ball and rocking. 'Please, Em. Don't come.'

He remained tightly clenched for several minutes then suddenly his head snapped up, the wolf sniffing and smelling the scent he was waiting for.

Remus grabbed hold of the steel frame of the bed, shaking uncontrollably now as he tried to stop the wolf inside him from taking over; from attacking her as she walked through the door.

'Hi,' she whispered as she walked in then she stopped. 'What's wrong?'

'Go,' he said harshly, trying not to breathe through his nose. 'Em, go. Now!'

'Why?' she asked, stepping forward and he cringed, gripping the rail tighter.

'Emma, please,' he begged. 'I'll hurt you. I'll hurt you.'

'Remus, you'd never hurt me,' she began but he let out a moan as he struggled against a horny, snapping wolf that wanted to claim this woman as roughly as he could.

'It's not me,' he insisted shakily. 'I'm not me. I'll hurt you, Em. Go. Now! NOW!'

At his shout, she spun around and ran out the door, locking it behind her. Letting out a shuddering breath, he let go and the wolf howled in anger. He fell to the ground, shaking violently and felt tears coming. He couldn't smell her anymore and the disgruntled wolf was retreating a little.

'What's happening to me?' he whispered, tears of frustration and fear streaking hot down his cheeks.

* * *

When Emma came to see him the next day, he asked his mother to tell her he was sleeping.

'I'm tired, Mum,' he said in answer to her surprise.

It was only a day or two until he left for school and, until he understood what had happened to him, he didn't want to be around her. He smelled her when she arrived and he felt the exhausted wolf lift his head. An hour later, his father brought him lunch.

'I'm not real hungry, dad,' he murmured, pulling the sheets up higher. His father shut the door behind him and sat on the bed.

'What's wrong?' he asked gently. 'Why didn't you want to see Emma?'

Remus felt his face collapsing and his eyes filled with tears. 'Dad, there's something wrong with me,' he whispered. 'I…I wanted to hurt Emma.'

His father frowned then listened as Remus told him how he'd felt the night before; how he'd struggled to control himself when he smelled Emma's scent; how he knew he'd force himself on her. He saw the concern in his father's face and he helped him out of bed. They went to apparate outside, telling Mrs Lupin that Remus wasn't feeling well and he was just taking him to their Healer for a check up.

* * *

Remus explained everything to the male Healer that he'd been seeing for years now then watched as the man thought.

'This girl, Emma,' he said. 'Have you been intimate with her?'

'We haven't had sex,' Remus said, blushing but the man shook his head.

'But you've been intimate with her? Engaged in some kind of sexual activity?'

He nodded and said, 'Yeah, but we've been…mucking around like that on and off for a couple of years now. Why did I just start feeling like this now?'

The man stared at him for a minute then asked, 'Before your transformation, did you feel like this? Feel a stronger urge than usual to be with her?'

Remus nodded. 'The day before,' he answered. 'We were fooling around a little and I just suddenly felt…strange.'

'And when you were…fooling around, did something happen that usually doesn't?' the Healer asked now. 'Did you go further than you have before?'

'No,' Remus said, embarrassment fading now as he thought. 'We've done that before.'

'Anything?' the man said. 'Remus, something sparked this off. Something about her struck a chord with you last night and we need to find out what it was so that we can go about trying to control it. Think. It could be something so small that you didn't think anything of it, but if it was new, different…'

Remus was quiet for several moments, replaying that day in the park. Emma had jerked him off then he'd masturbated her in return. He'd felt normal then still. She'd hit him, his hand was still in her knickers. He remembered the musky smell of her and how he'd wanted more than anything to taste her. Recalling the taste of her on his fingers now made his body react - instant hard on pulsing in his pants and he felt the wolf inside him sniff the air, searching for her.

'I…I could smell her…,' he said haltingly, crossing his legs quickly.

'Her arousal? You have an incredible sense of smell,' the Healer asked and Remus nodded.

'I…I've never tasted her before,' he whispered, looking away from the man. 'I wanted to so - I put my finger in my mouth and…I felt really strange afterwards.'

'Strange how?' he asked and Remus closed his eyes.

'I wanted to…I wanted to screw her. Right there, straight away. I got a…a hard on again and I had to go or I knew I'd do something.'

The man looked at Remus now and asked gently, 'And just thinking about it now…?'

'God, yeah alright,' Remus spat, looking at the ground. 'I've got one now too. What the hell is wrong with me?'

The man sat back in his chair and frowned. 'Hmm,' he said. 'It's normal for teenage lycanthropes to get a bit more aggressive around the full moon but the urges you are experiencing are too strong for normal full moon syndrome. You have the taste for her now. The wolf recognises her; it wants her.'

He sighed and stood up. 'I think, now the moon is waning, that you'll be able to control yourself around her. Please don't have any more sexual contact with her until I speak with you. I'm going to do some research but, if what I suspect is true, you may have to prepare yourself to cut off contact with this girl.'

'I can't,' Remus cried, standing up. 'She's my best friend. I have to see her.'

'Remus, just let me figure this out first,' the Healer said. 'Let me talk to your father.'

Remus left, sending his father in. He sat slunk over on his chair and his mood didn't improve when his father emerged, his face a little pale.

'Come on,' he said, helping his son up. 'Let's go get some dinner.'

* * *

Remus asked him at home to tell him what the Healer said but he told him he knew nothing other than the Healer was looking into it. He fell into a troubled sleep, unaware that his parent's were discussing the problem.

'He thinks she's his mate,' Mr Lupin explained to his wife. 'Something triggered it and…now the wolf part of him wants to mate with her.'

She frowned but didn't look overly concerned. 'So?' she asked. 'He's told us he and Emma were talking about beginning a sexual relationship. It's not just the wolf part of him. Won't he grow out of it? Is it like a physical attraction? We'll just stop them seeing each other for a while…'

But Mr Lupin shook his head. 'No,' he said emphatically. 'It's not just an attraction. It's a fixation; an instinct. It's an animal instinct - just like a wild wolf. He can…smell her and if he lets it go, he'd take her - willing or not.'

'He'd never…' she began in horror.

'No, Remus would never hurt Emma,' he said in despair. 'But he isn't Remus. It isn't him. A deeper, baser instinct drives him and he wouldn't hesitate to take what he wanted.'

Mrs Lupin thought for a moment then looked up, her forehead creased. 'I can't believe I'm saying this but…should we just let them have sex? Stop fighting it and let them…get it out of their system. At least Emma would be willing…'

'That occurred to me too,' he admitted. 'But according to the Healer, him forcing her is not the only problem. If they do consummate, she'll be his mate. Forever, Kathy. Werewolves mate for life, only finding another mate after the death of his own. If he had sex with someone he recognised as his mate, he'd think she was his; that she belonged to him. He'd never let her go, Kath. He'd kill her before he let her go.'

His wife looked frightened and covered her mouth with her hand. 'He can't see her anymore,' she said softly. 'We can't risk this happening. Emma…should we tell her parents?'

Mr Lupin shrugged. 'I don't know,' he said softly. 'The Healer said it was up to us whether or not to tell Remus. I think we should. He needs to know why it's so important for him to stay away from Emma. They were together the other day…that's what sparked this. They went to the park and somehow managed to do enough to bring this about. We can't watch them at school. Even Dumbledore can't watch them all the time.'

'He'll have to pull out,' she said but he shook his head.

'If we tell him how important it is that they not have contact; maybe tell Emma too, he should be able to control it until just before and just after the full moon.'

'You think we should tell Emma?' she asked and he let out a breath of laughter.

'Do you think that little girl would take Remus shutting her out without a fight?' he commented and Mrs Lupin smiled.

'I suppose not,' she said softly.

There was a moment's silence then she said tearily, 'He's going to be devastated, John.'

'I know,' her husband said wearily. 'I know.'


	8. Chapter 8

**Poor Remmie! Will he ever get laid? Angst coming up then more sex then more angst. Don't ya love fan fiction?**

Chapter Eight

Remus walked through the brick barrier at Platform 9 ¾ to catch the Hogwarts Express, followed by his parents. He kept his head down, not wanting to see anyone. Who was he kidding? He didn't want to see Emma. His dad loaded the trunk on the train, and he lifted his head slowly and looked around. Almost immediately, his gaze was drawn to his right and he locked eyes with Emma. She stared at him, unable to hide her hurt. Lily Evans said something to her and she nodded, turning away from him to follow her friend onto the train. Remus closed his eyes and looked back down until Sirius, James and Peter saw him and hustled him onto the train.

'Remus,' called his father. 'Don't forget.'

He nodded and tried to smile as he waved good bye. His parent's had sat him down the day before and told him what the Healer thought. At the moment, he hated himself for doing this to him and Emma; for bringing about what would probably be the end of their friendship. And he had to tell her. His father insisted, telling him she deserved a proper explanation for his standoffishness. 'If you care for her, respect her, you'll have to tell her,' he said.

He would tell her. Not here, though. Not yet. He wasn't strong enough to be near her yet.

Emma was barely listening to the Gryffindor girls as they discussed their OWL results from last year and what subjects they were doing this year. She leaned her head against the cool window and thought about Remus - his refusal to see her; his strange behaviour the night of his transformation; his coldness towards her now.

'If he doesn't want anything to do with me, at least he could tell me,' she thought angrily.

She'd been confused about her feelings towards him lately, they hadn't been just "practicing" on each other this summer. They'd been doing what they did because they wanted each other; wanted to be with each other like that.

'It's just physical,' she told herself. 'It's nice; it feels really good and we can do it without feeling weird or self conscious.'

But deep down, she knew it was becoming more than that - for her anyway.

'Obviously not for him,' she muttered then said, 'Nothing,' when the other girls asked her what she'd said.

* * *

Remus waited until he was half way through his cycle - when he was at his strongest - before he approached Emma one evening.

'Em?' he said softly, sitting next to her in the Common room.

She stood up and walked past him without a word.

'Emma,' he said, unable to hide the desperation in his rising voice.

Several students turned to look at him in surprise, including Emma. 'What?' she snapped and he moved closer.

'Please, come with me?' he asked, his face betraying his fear. 'I need to explain something to you and I can't do it here.'

A muscle in her jaw jumped but she sighed loudly then nodded. He walked up the stairs to his room, Emma following. Sirius greeted them as they walked in, smiling a little broader at Emma.

'You look good, Em,' he said with a grin and she tried to smile.

'You too,' she murmured then sat on Remus' bed.

He drew the curtains and cast a locking spell as well as a Silencing spell then sat down opposite her.

'First, I want to say sorry for not seeing you or talking to you over the last week or so..' he began.

'Thirteen days,' she said abruptly. 'It's been thirteen days.'

He looked at her and knew she wasn't going to make this easy. She was hurt and, damn it, all he wanted to do was hold her and kiss her and tell her how much he wanted her.

'I couldn't see you until I was stronger,' he told her. 'Something happened to me this month. Em, when we were in the park…I, um, put my finger in my mouth after I…you know.'

She flushed and nodded. 'Well, it did something to me.'

Emma frowned and looked offended. 'What?' she said with a horrified expression. 'Did I make you sick?'

'No!' he said quickly. 'No, Em. That's not it. I…I loved it. You taste…amazing. The thing is, I'm not the only one who thinks that.'

She looked confused and he sighed. 'When I did that, something changed inside me. The wolf part of me kind of…took over and that's why I told you to leave that night. I wasn't myself. I wanted you too much, Em. I would have hurt you.'

'I don't believe you'd hurt me,' she said but he grabbed her hands.

'Jack, it wasn't me,' he told her. 'I would have been rough and selfish and if you hadn't agreed to sleep with me…I probably would have forced you to.'

Emma shook her head, looking confused and a little scared now. 'The wolf…it recognises your smell; your taste now. It wants you. It wants to mate with you and I'm afraid I can't stop it.'

She frowned. 'So, you want to have sex with me?' she asked, not quite understanding the big deal. 'Ok. I want to, just not right now…'

'It's not that simple, Em,' he said. '_I_ want to be with you but I'll wait until you're ready. The wolf needs to be with you and it'll do anything; it won't stop until it takes you. It thinks you're its mate.'

'You aren't going to ask me to have sex with you when you're transformed, are you?' she asked and he shook his head.

'No,' he said. 'It doesn't work like that. The wolf…it's always there; always inside me. It just doesn't usually make itself known. But, it got one taste of you and now it won't go away again. I'm scared I won't be able to control it, Em. I could really hurt you. I could…force you.'

She thought for a moment then said, 'So, do I have to stay away from you around the full moon? Is that it?'

He nodded and said, 'A day or two either side of it. But there's something else. We can't have sex or any contact like that - at all. Ever.'

'What?' she asked, startled. 'Why not?'

'Because you can't give me more of you,' he said softly. 'Em, it already wants you for it's mate and I'm finding it hard to control it. If it gets more of a taste…'

He took a deep breath. 'I could have sex with other girls and it wouldn't matter but…the wolf thinks you're its mate. And, if it has you, it won't let you go. Werewolves mate for life. If we were together, I would only want you; I would only want you to be with me. You'd be my mate. I don't know why, but it's chosen you and, if we were to get together…'

'It'd be like we were…married or something,' she finished and he nodded. 'We'd never be able to be with anyone else?'

'If I smelt someone else on you, I'd get angry. I could hurt you,' he confirmed.

Emma looked down at the blanket and curled herself into a ball. He let her process what he'd told her. After a few minutes, she looked up at him.

'What if I do it with someone else now?' she said softly. 'Try and put the wolf off? Or what if you have sex with someone else? Maybe that would…confuse it. Maybe if we just do it with someone else first, that would put it off me.'

'No,' he said regretfully, wishing it were that easy. 'Once it's chosen the one it wants, it won't be budged. I'm sorry, Em. I did this. I should have looked into this more. I should never have started this with you. You're my friend and now I…'

He stopped talking, biting his lip to try and stop his tears from falling. 'I'm still your friend,' she insisted, moving closer and taking his hand. 'You're still my best friend, Lupin. You can't get away from me that easily.'

He smiled, wiping away a stray tear. 'Honey,' she said softly, wiping his cheeks with her thumbs. 'It's ok, Remus. I'm sorry. It was my idea. I shouldn't have… It's alright. We're still friends. We'll just be careful around the full moon and we can't be together like that anymore.'

She hugged him and he felt his body stir and his chest tighten painfully. 'Good thing I really don't fancy you, isn't it?' she whispered, feeling empty, and he smiled and nodded.

'Good thing,' he mumbled, putting his arms around her.

Considering they'd never really been together, it was startling how much this felt like a loss. She pulled back and swiped at her own face.

'I should go,' she said, standing up.

He nodded and stood as well. 'I won't stop being your friend, Lupin,' she said softly. She kissed his cheek quickly. 'Night.'

He repeated the farewell and, when he parted the curtains, he saw Sirius watching them. He saw their faces and frowned.

'You alright, Moony,' he asked and Remus shook his head.

'Not really,' he said with a grim smile. 'But I'll live.'

* * *

They did manage to keep their friendship intact. It frustrated them both to have to avoid each other around the full moon when it was the time he needed her the most, but it helped Remus keep Moony under control. The wolf still clawed at him to find her when he occasionally caught a whiff of her but she never got close enough to drive it crazy. That was until one night late in the year when word reached her that Sirius had played a trick on one of the Slytherin students, sending him down to see Remus whilst he was in full transformation. Remus could have killed him and was distraught. Sirius tried to apologize but Remus didn't want to hear it - it was still too raw. He lay on his bed, trying not to break down, when he smelt her.

'Emma!' he called, sitting up. The wolf too, was aroused and began to urge him to go to her; to claim her. 'Don't come in here.'

'How did you know it was me?' she asked, ignoring his request and appearing in the doorway.

'I could smell you,' he said, frowning when his body sprang into life and the wolf tensed. 'You really do need to leave,' he said weakly.

She moved over to the bed. 'Are you…controlling it?' she asked and he nodded.

'Barely,' he whispered, his breathing beginning to speed up. 'Please, Em.'

'Are you ok?' she asked, sitting on the bed.

Remus shuffled back, breathing through his mouth, feeling every nerve in his body thrum with excitement at having her so close.

'I'm fine,' he said quickly. 'Jack, go.'

She bit her lip. 'If I touch you, if I make you come, will that satisfy it for now? Will that mean I can stay with you for a little while?'

'I don't know,' he said and she crawled onto the bed, stopping when he moved back. 'If it wants more, you aren't strong enough to stop me.'

'I'm willing to take the chance,' she said and he shook his head.

'I'm not,' he told her.

'Remus, tell me you don't need me right now and I'll go,' she said, staring at him. 'Remember, you can't lie to save your life.'

He closed his eyes. She knew him far too well. He needed her tonight more than he ever had before. He needed her to hold him and tell him that he wasn't a monster; that everything would be fine.

'I need you,' he admitted. 'But I'll need you tomorrow and the next day and the next day. If I rape you tonight, you won't be there.'

He knew he was being blunt but there wasn't any way to pretty this up. If she stayed, he'd probably rape her.

She was silent then stood up. 'Alright,' she said, obviously upset. 'Good thing I can take rejection.'

'Em,' he said but she shook her head.

'It's fine, Lupin. Get some rest and try not to worry too much. We'll talk in a few days.'

'Emma,' he whispered, eyes filling. 'Thanks.'

Her own blue eyes were watery and she blinked rapidly then nodded before she left.

* * *

Sixth year finished and they went home for the summer, Emma organising to spend the week of Remus' transformation with Lily Evans. She and Lily went out with James Potter, who Lily had just begun seeing, and Sirius Black, who had moved in with James. Sirius showed an interest in Emma again and she gave into him, spending some time with him in his room. She refused to progress beyond mutual masturbation, realising after a couple of days that she was still holding onto hope that Remus would be her first. Deciding to leave Lily's early, she said her goodbyes then went to Remus' house.

'Is it too soon?' she asked Mrs Lupin when she answered the door.

'No, I think he's alright,' she replied, taking her up the stairs to Remus' room.

He was reading on his bed and sat up with a small smile when he saw her. 'Hi,' he said and she smiled back.

His mother left and he lost his smile. 'You've been with someone,' he said accusingly and she frowned.

'What?' she asked and he stood up, jealously crashing through him like waves.

'You've been with a guy,' he growled, moving closer. 'I could smell him on you the second you got here.'

'Remus,' she said, getting a little frightened at his intensity. 'I was. I was with Sirius - just a couple of times and we didn't sleep together. Are you…?'

'Jealous?' he asked with a bark of humourless laughter. 'You bet your pretty little ass I am.'

She was startled to see this side of him but was equally as shocked at how turned on she was by his jealousy.

'God, I want the wolf to be jealous,' she realised. 'I want him to be jealous and to make me his.'

'Should I go?' she asked, confused by her emotions, and he pounced, grabbing her roughly and throwing her down on his bed.

'If I bite you; if I take you, you'll be mine,' he said harshly covering her body with his. 'I'll have you to myself.'

She felt cold wash through her. If he bit her hard enough, if he attacked her, would he make her a werewolf?

His face pressed into her neck and she felt his teeth scraping her skin and she decided to call his bluff.

'Bite me then,' she murmured and he frowned, seeming to lose some of that out of control look. 'Take me and make me yours. I'll be yours.'

'Em,' he moaned, Remus back now. 'Go away before I hurt you.'

'No,' she said softly then pulled his face to hers, kissing him.

She wasn't sure what she was doing but all she knew was it had felt wrong with Sirius. This felt right. If she had to be his, for the rest of her life, then she'd do it, just to be able to feel like this.

He pulled away, using his last thread of self control. 'Please, baby,' he whispered desperately. 'Go and come back tomorrow. I'll be better then. I don't want to hurt you, Em. I'm so scared I'm going to hurt you.'

He was shaking, both with the effort of controlling himself and his fear. His final words, and the tears in his blue eyes, got through to her and she pushed him off of her, standing and walking out the door without another word.

* * *

She went to the park, swinging for several hours, thinking. She went home at dark and lay awake most of the night. Early the next morning, she went to her parents and asked that they allow her to leave and be on her own for the rest of the holidays.

'Where are you going?' her father said with a frown.

'I don't know,' she admitted. 'I just need to get away. I need to think.'

'Is this about Remus?' Mrs Jack asked.

Emma had told her parents about Remus over the last break and they were still trying to wrap their minds around it. Learning that their daughter's closest friend was a werewolf, a supposedly mythical creature, was a lot for a Muggle to comprehend and to find out the he'd set his mind on her as his mate…

'Yes. I'm of age,' she reminded them. 'And I'll stay in the Wizarding world. I can use magic if I need it. I've got the money Gran left me to use in my Gringott's vault and I'll get all my books and school things in Diagon Alley. I'll take Hooter with me and I'll contact you once a week alright? Please. I just need to be alone for a while.'

Her parent's looked at her then her mother nodded. 'Alright,' she murmured. 'We'll give you some money for your school things and accommodation. If you need anything, write and ask.'

'Thanks,' she said, hugging the woman then her father. 'I'll send Hooter with a note to let you know where I am. I'll probably stay at the Leaky Cauldron for a while.'

'Just be careful,' her father said and she nodded.

'I will be,' she promised then left to pack.

She came down half an hour later, her trunk shrunk and in her pocket. She handed her mother an envelope.

'Could you give that to Remus for me?' she asked quietly. 'Not until after I apparate though, please?'

She nodded and, after a goodbye, Emma apparated to London, appearing outside the Leaky Cauldron. Settling into a room, she chucked a few Owl treats into Hooter's cage then spent the rest of the day exploring Diagon Alley. She finished her set work for the holidays then got all her books and uniforms for the school year. In between shopping trips and study, she had a lot of time to think and, two weeks later, she'd made a decision and OWLed a letter to Remus.

* * *

Emma was eating breakfast the next day when he appeared, sitting down opposite her.

'You're a hard woman to find,' he said, staring at her.

He saw the slight bags under her eyes and was worried that her face was paler than usual. Her hair was piled into a messy bun on top of her head and she was dressed casually in jeans and a t-shirt but she looked gorgeous. He was a little taken aback by the joy he felt seeing her again. The last couple of weeks had been agony - not knowing where she was, her parents respecting her request to not tell him, was torture. He missed her and was relieved she'd contacted him, frightened that he'd scared her so badly last time they spoke that she never wanted to see him again.

'I wanted it that way,' she said softly, putting down her fork. 'Do you want something to eat?' He shook his head and she stood up. 'Come on then.'

He followed her up the stairs to her room. He stood uncertainly until she frowned at him.

'Sit down,' she said, gesturing to the bed as she fed the owl.

'Jack..' he began but she shook her head.

'The wolf wants me to be his mate,' she said, sitting on an armchair. 'What about you?'

He looked surprised and blinked. 'Me?' he asked and she nodded.

'If we did have sex, I'd be your mate. Yours too, not just the wolf's. How do you feel about that?'

Remus looked as though he was having trouble following her but said, 'You're my best friend, Em, and I…I really care about you. I'm not sure how I feel about all this. On the one hand, I wouldn't want you having to spend your life with me instead of someone you really loved. On the other, very selfish hand, I want you, Em. That's it. I want you and I don't ever want to smell anyone else's scent on you. I can't stand the thought of you being with someone else; or another man touching you.'

He sighed and shook his head, not confident he was ready to tell her what he'd realised over the past fortnight so he tried a little joke.

'Maybe…maybe I do fancy you a little.'

He looked at her and was surprised to see her smiling. 'Emma?'

She stood up and her fingers moved to the hem of her shirt, pulling it over her head.

'I want you too,' she admitted. 'I hate that I can't be with you when you need me. I hate that I can't bring myself to even think about being with someone else. I hate that I feel sick thinking about you being with someone else. Seems like I'm yours already, Remus. We may as well make it official.'

She undid her jeans and slid them down her legs, stepping out of them.

'Em, what are you doing?' he whispered, unable to stop his eyes wandering.

She really did have an amazing little body and he could feel himself hardening. The wolf, although weak at this time, was raising its head hopefully, smelling its mate and sensing victory.

'I'm doing the only thing I know feels right,' she murmured, reaching around her back and unclipping her bra. 'I don't know exactly what I feel, but I know that you are the only person I can't imagine my life without, yet you're the one I could lose. I don't want to lose you.'

'I can't do this, Em,' he said softly. 'I can't do this to you. It'll be forever, honey.'

'I know,' she said, standing before him in only her underwear.

She pulled them down then looked down at him, putting her hands on his shoulders. 'I want it to be you, Remus. I guess I do fancy you a little after all.'


	9. Chapter 9

**OMG! They are finally of age. They're gonna do it! Yay!**

**WARNING: Sex. Finally! But not everyone's happy. And neither will I be if I don't get some more reviews. You've been warned!!**

* * *

Chapter Nine

Remus' hands came up of their own accord and he put them on her waist, marvelling that they went all the way around.

'You're so little, Em,' he murmured. 'I love it. I love how small you are. Makes me feel stronger or something.'

She smiled and pulled his shirt over his head. 'You like feeling like a macho man?' she murmured and he chuckled, letting his hands slide down to her hips.

'I guess I do,' he said softly then leaned forward to press a kiss against her ribs. 'Are you scared?'

He looked up at her, his face still resting on her and saw her shake her head.

'I'm a little nervous,' she admitted. 'But I'm not scared. I want to do this, Remus.'

He stared at her for another few moments, seeing the absolute certainty in her eyes. 'Do you?' she continued. 'You're going to be as stuck to me as I will be to you. Are you sure it's me you want?'

Remus smiled broadly and nodded. 'That's the only thing I am sure about,' he said softly then stood up and kissed her.

Softly, letting it grow naturally as their hands both went to his pants, working together to undo his fly and pull them down. She pushed him back onto the bed and he laughed.

'Bossy little thing, aren't you?' he said and she grinned.

'I know what I want,' she retorted, climbing onto the bed and holding herself over him. 'You're an alpha male, aren't you? When you're near transforming time? You like to be in control.'

He nodded, she'd been doing some reading, and she smiled.

'Well, I'll have to have my way with you while I can then.'

Her mouth fell to his neck and she bit him hard, making him wince. 'There,' she murmured, lips shifting down his body. 'I bit you. You're mine now.'

Remus closed his eyes when she sucked a nipple into her mouth. 'I think I was always yours, Jack,' he mumbled then moaned when she nibbled him.

'Damn right,' she whispered as her hand wrapped around his cock. 'I warn you, Remus. I can be pretty possessive myself. You're not the only one that might get cranky if I smell someone else on you.'

She stroked him and he growled, both in lust and pleasure at her possessiveness. Emma smiled then lowered her head to him, licking him thoroughly first until he was begging her to suck him. She did and he gripped her head tightly. After several seconds, he pulled her away, taking some deep breaths to try and control himself.

'I never did get to finish what we started last summer,' he said, flipping her over too easily. 'I want to taste you. Properly.'

He held himself over her and looked down. 'Em, this is it. Once I do this, there's no turning back. I don't know if I'll be able to stop it once it's got your taste.'

'I know,' she whispered. 'I've been thinking about this for a year, Remus. Will you just stop teasing me and do it?'

Remus grinned then kissed her, his mouth following a similar path to hers as he found lots of hot spots on her body, memorising each one for future reference. When he trailed kisses up her thigh, he almost lost control, wanting to just crawl inside her, but he paused, fighting down the desire. Emma spread her legs further apart, desperately wanting him to do…something to ease the aching inside her. Remus smiled in satisfaction, a little wolf coming through, as he gazed at her and breathed in her scent. He flicked his tongue at her clit and heard her gasp. Feeling a surge of need, he stroked her firmly, lapping at her then sliding his fingers inside her, first one, then another, then one more as he tried to stretch her a little in preparation for her taking him.

Emma was thrusting her hips up frantically, making little mewing noises in her throat. Instinct was driving him now and he sucked her clit hard. He was glad she'd put a Silencing spell in place earlier when she screamed, grabbing his hair and yanking hard on it as she held his face harder to her. Her clit throbbed under his tongue and her body clamped down hard around his fingers. Remus groaned into her, making sure he lapped up all of her arousal as his cock ached and pulsed, eager to be inside her.

Her body completely relaxed, and he kissed his way over her again, chuckling a little at how limp she was. He licked a nipple and she moaned a little, and he nipped at it, making the nub tighten.

'You're going to kill me,' she whispered hoarsely.

'God, I hope not,' he said, kissing her throat and letting his teeth scrape over her skin. 'I want to do that again.'

Raising his head, he saw her grin and he couldn't wait any longer. 'Can I kiss you?' he asked, letting his lips graze her jaw. 'You want to taste yourself?'

She blinked then nodded and he crushed his lips to hers, kissing her hard and fast as he felt the tip of his now painfully hard cock nudged the entrance to her body. At the touch, her legs parted further and he moaned against her lips at her willingness to continue.

'I'll try to go slow,' he muttered, shaking a little as he felt her softness around the head of his erection.

'I've got a pain potion,' she murmured, kissing his chin. 'Do it.'

He looked down at her and saw the trust in her face. Pressing slowly into her, he kissed her tenderly, not wanting her to only remember the pain. When she was wriggling under him, he clenched his jaw and pushed harder, feeling the barrier break and his cock become encased in her. Emma tensed and bit her lip to hold back the tiny cry of pain that rose involuntarily.

'Em?' he asked shakily, the sensation of her body clamping around his almost too much for him.

'I'm ok,' she whispered. It hadn't hurt as much as she thought it would and he felt good in her. It felt right.

'I fit, Em,' he said softly, kissing her gently. 'We fit together perfectly.'

She felt good bumps break out all over her and she smiled, tears rising in her eyes. He knew she'd been worried about his size and wanted to ease her mind straight away. Touched, she tried to cover her emotion.

'Course we do,' she said and he smiled, kissing her again as he moved, withdrawing a little then pushing slowly back into her. There was a slight sting, but it felt more good than painful and soon, Emma was moving with him, finding a rhythm that worked as they felt their tension rising until it was unbearable.

'Em, I can't wait anymore,' he gasped then felt her tighten all around him. 'Fuck, I really want you to come, baby. I want to feel it.'

His words sent a wave of emotion and lust through her and she cried out as she felt herself fall. The second he knew she was there, he joined her, almost howling his pleasure as he came deep inside his mate, a powerful tingle sweeping over them as he claimed her completely as his. Emma felt the warmth from his body flooding through her and unconsciously, gave part of herself to him. She'd given herself willingly - and so became entwined with him. They were mated.

* * *

Remus fell onto her, taking several seconds to get himself under control again. Tears were threatening to spill over and he was shaking with emotion as he buried his face into her neck. He'd felt it - the moment they bonded, just after their releases while they were still riding the waves of pleasure. She was inside him now, like they'd melted together and he wondered if she felt it as well.

'Did you feel it?' she whispered and he raised his head to look at her. 'I felt it, Remus.'

She looked a little surprised. She wasn't sure whether she'd feel their bonding and, in all honesty, had forgotten completely about anything except how frigging fantastic he was making her feel.

'I did too,' he said softly, kissing her and smiling. 'I guess it was real. We're mated now, Em.'

Emma smiled, a little shakily, at him. He rolled over so he wasn't squashing her and pulled her close.

'Are you ok?' he asked and she nodded.

'You?' she returned and he smiled.

'Yeah,' he murmured, reaching up to her face and stroking her cheek. 'That was amazing, Em.'

'Uh huh,' she said, sliding her leg over the top of his and wriggling closer. 'Do you feel different?'

Remus thought for a minute, absently caressing her face.

'I do,' he said softly. 'I feel…like I've found something that was missing; something I didn't realise I needed until I found it again.'

She stared at him then smiled. 'That's it,' she agreed. 'That's what it feels like.'

'For you too?' he queried, surprised.

'Yeah,' she said. 'I didn't think I'd feel anything but I did. I guess it was really meant to be.'

Remus smiled, continuing to stroke her face. They lay there for a long time, just gazing at each other, touching each other gently. It seemed like hours before Remus cleared his throat.

'I love you, Em,' he whispered.

Emma smiled, tears making her eyes shine. 'I love you too,' she whispered back, leaning over to press her lips to his.

'Really?' he asked, his face lighting up.

He'd realised when she'd left two weeks ago that he loved her as much more than a friend now, but was sure she wouldn't feel the same. Now, not only were they mated, she loved him.

'Really,' she said with a giggle. 'The night before I left, when you told me how scared you were you'd hurt me, I realised how much I wanted to be with you; how much I loved you. That's why I left. I got a bit scared myself I guess and I needed time to think. I wanted to be sure about how I felt because I knew that we couldn't just break up if it wasn't working. I knew once we did this, it would be "till death do us part" and I had to be sure before I committed.'

'And you are sure?' he asked, knowing it was too late now.

'I am,' she said confidently and he kissed her.

'Tell me you love me again,' he demanded, rolling a little so he was lying across her chest.

Emma giggled and wrapped her leg around him as her arms circled his shoulders. 'I love you, Lupin,' she said with a grin and he let out a loud 'whoop' of excitement, making her laugh.

He sat up and looked down at her. 'We should get married,' he exclaimed and she laughed harder.

'Oh, yeah,' she said in amusement. 'I can imagine my parents when we turn up and tell them that not only did we have sex after they told us not to, we are now mated for life and legally married.'

'Yeah, my parents might have a little problem with that as well,' he said with a frown. Then he looked back over at her. 'I don't care.'

He jumped out of bed and knelt on the ground, naked. 'Emma Jack,' he said, taking her hand. 'Marry me.'

Emma giggled then lost her smile when she saw he was serious. 'Are you for real?' she asked, sitting up and frowning when he nodded.

'We're mated, Em,' he said earnestly. 'We're stuck with each other now - for life. We would only be making it legal.'

'I suppose,' she murmured, thinking.

When she'd made her decision to sleep with him, she'd accepted the condition that, in doing so, she'd by tying herself to him for the rest of her life. Marriage was only a legal bonding, they already made the commitment.

'Em?' he asked and she smiled.

'Alright,' she agreed and he looked stunned.

'You'll marry me?' he said and she nodded.

'Yeah, I will,' she said, slightly disbelievingly.

He dove back onto the bed and they both laughed then their lips met and for a long time, there was very little talking.

* * *

The day of Remus' transformation, a week before they returned for their final year at Hogwarts, they returned home to face the music.

Remus had lied to his parents when he went to meet Emma in London, telling them he was visiting James and Sirius. He'd owled them that first afternoon and apologised for lying and telling them the truth - that he was with Emma and they would be staying away until his next transformation. He didn't tell them where they were, knowing they'd come after him. They apparated to Hogsmeade, staying in a pub there as Emma's parents knew where she was.

They arrived at Remus' house, having owled Emma's parents, asking them to meet them there. When they walked in, it was obvious both sets of parents were furious. Emma tightened her grip on Remus' hand and he squeezed back.

'Hi,' he said and got glares in return.

'Remus Lupin,' said his father, standing up. 'I have never been more disappointed in you.'

Emma frowned and opened her mouth to defend him but Remus shook his head. 'Just wait, dad,' he said softly. 'I have a feeling you'll revise that statement in a few minutes.' There was silence then…

'Tell me you didn't,' Mrs Jack said tearfully, looking at Emma.

'I did,' she said and her mother started to cry.

'Mum, please,' she said, going over to the woman and putting her arm around her. 'Mum, it's alright.'

'You have a connection now,' the older woman sobbed. 'What if you want someone else? You're so young, Emma. How can you possibly make this kind of decision?' 'Remus, I can't believe you'd do this,' Mr Lupin said. 'You know that now Emma is tied to you for life. If you really cared for her, you would have never let her do this.'

'It's done now,' Emma said then looked over at Remus. 'We're mated and we can't take it back. We don't want to take it back. I love Remus, mum. And…'

She looked at Remus for help and he said, 'And I love Emma. We didn't just do this because we have no self control. We thought long and hard about it and we wanted this.'

He paused then looked at Emma who nodded. 'We're married. We were bonded a week ago at the Ministry of Magic. We'd already made the commitment - marrying just made it legal.'

All four parents looked stunned then Emma's father, who hadn't said a word, stood and walked out of the house, slamming the front door behind him. Mr Lupin also stood up, shaking with anger.

'I cannot believe you two could be so irresponsible,' he fumed. 'I can't talk to you right now.'

He also stormed out, going upstairs. Mrs Lupin looked from one teenager to the other. 'You're really married?' she asked faintly and Remus nodded, moving over to Emma, who stood up.

'We are,' she said, looking at her mother, who looked stunned still. 'I'm sorry that we've disappointed all of you but this was a decision only we could make. You couldn't help and we've done what's best for us.'

'We are sure,' Remus added. 'We would always have been connected and we love each other. We want this. We wanted to be bonded like this. It just happened earlier than we expected.'

The two women sat quietly, not sure what they could say. 'We know this has been a shock but there really is nothing anyone can do about it now,' he said. 'It's happened. We're married and we're mated.'

Mrs Jack winced. 'Mum,' Emma said, seeing her mother's grimace. 'We don't expect you to accept this - not right away. But we did hope you'd try to understand.'

Remus could see Emma was getting upset and took her hand, all his protective instincts close to the surface so near to his change. His mate was hurting and he would do anything to protect her.

'I think we should go and get something to eat,' he said softly. 'Give everyone some time to settle down and we can talk later.'

He looked at his mother. 'I'll see you later, mum.'

She nodded and he led Emma out of the house, apparating them to the nearby park.

* * *

Emma sank onto the ground under a tree and buried her face in her hands. 'Dad wouldn't even talk to me,' she muttered and he sat down next to her, putting his arm around her.

'Baby, don't cry,' he said softly, pulling her close to him. 'Em, honey, it's ok. They'll come around.'

She didn't respond and he gripped her chin, making her look at him. 'Do you regret this, Emma?' he asked and she immediately shook her head.

'No,' she insisted. 'I don't regret it. I just wish our choice didn't hurt them so much.'

He sighed and put his arms around her, hugging her tight. 'So do I,' he whispered.

He hated that his parents were disappointed in him but he loved Emma more than anything - more than he cared about what they thought of him.

'They will get used to this. It was a shock, that's all.'

She nodded and slid her arms around her husband. 'Tell me you love me,' she said into his chest. 'Make this worth it.'

He raised her face and kissed her. 'I love you, Emma Lupin,' he said with certainty. Emma smiled at his use of her new surname and put her head back on his chest. 'Worth it,' she murmured.


	10. Chapter 10

**This story is coming to an end. Sob! **

**Please review! I'm suffering withdrawals.**

**WARNING: Sex. Um, maybe not rough but...vigourous!**

* * *

Chapter Ten

"Married?' Dumbledore murmured, looking from Remus to Emma then to Mr and Mrs Lupin, both of whom looked unhappy.

'I assume this was…unexpected,' he remarked to them and they all nodded.

Mr Lupin went on to explain that Remus had discovered that Emma was his mate and that they had… "consummated that relationship then decided to make it legal."

'Well, this presents a bit of a problem,' Dumbledore mumbled, staring at the so far silent couple. 'I assume you are asking to share a room?'

They both nodded and he frowned slightly. 'Well, we do not have married quarters for students and I cannot allow you to share a room with your roommates….there is a spare room in the lower part of Gryffindor tower that we use when we have a larger influx of students. I suppose we could arrange for you to take that for the year.'

'Thank you, Professor,' Remus said softly, squeezing Emma's hand and seeing his parents frown.

They'd been dreading this - Dumbledore was perfectly within his rights to refuse to allow them to stay in the same room, but it seemed the man might understand better than their parents did. Emma's parents being Muggles did not come to the castle but were waiting for word on what the Headmaster had to say.

'Could you talk to them, Albus?' Mr Lupin asked now. 'Explain why they should break the bond. Emma's family want to take her to finish her schooling at Beauxbatens so we can try and also break the mating.'

'You will not be able to do that,' the old man said gently. 'Not unless both parties are willing and you have enough distance between them. France is not far enough and I am guessing that neither party is wanting for this to occur?'

He looked at Remus and Emma, who both shook their heads. 'You could break the marriage bond easily enough,' he continued, looking at the Lupins. 'But it has to be their decision. They are of age. They have a right to marry - whether we agree with it or not.'

Mr Lupin looked disappointed. Remus knew their parent's had been hoping the Headmaster would help them separate he and Emma. Emma's parent's wanted to move, take her away but, because she was of age, they couldn't force her.

'Thank God you're not a Muggle,' he whispered the night after they'd told her. 'They don't come of age until eighteen.'

He pulled her closer as they lay in their bed at the Leaky Cauldron. 'I'm sorry, baby. I wish I could've been there with you.'

Both parents had refused to allow them to stay in the same room so they had gone back to the pub. Remus had been dismayed although not surprised by their parent's reactions but Emma had copped the bulk of the complaints; crying in her old bed the night of Remus' transformation. Remus' parent's didn't have a chance to yell at him too much before he changed, but her parents took advantage of him not being there and really applied pressure, threatening to have Remus exposed as a werewolf if she didn't leave him.

Emma was furious. 'If you do that, you can forget about ever seeing me again,' she hissed, shaking with anger. 'I would never forgive you.'

They'd backed down in the face of her fury but were still rigorous in their demands that she leave with them.

'Can we get to the feast now, sir?' Emma asked now, speaking for the first time. 'This is a waste of everyone's time. I'm sorry, Mr and Mrs Lupin, but we aren't breaking our bond. You and my parents can either accept that or Remus and I will have to accept that you are no longer part of our lives.'

She looked at Remus who nodded. They'd talked about this. 'I guess this is an ultimatum,' she continued. 'Either support us or leave us alone. You can pass that message onto my parents as well. Professor? Can we go?'

He nodded and they left the room, walking down the winding stairs to the Entrance hall.

'Em, you alright?' he asked, stopping her before they entered the full Dining Hall.

'Not really,' she muttered, running a shaking hand over her face.

He pulled her close and hugged her, feeling her arms moving around him. 'It'll be fine, Em,' he soothed, kissing the top of her head that just reached his chin. 'I promise. Would your alpha male let you down?'

She chuckled despite herself and pulled back. 'I knew there was a reason I fancied you, Lupin,' she said, taking his face in her hands and pulling it down to hers.

'I thought you fancied me cause I'm great in bed,' he mumbled against her lips and she grinned.

'That too,' she told him, pinching him on the ass. She leaned back in his embrace and studied him. 'What do you think Sirius, James and Peter will say?'

'I think they'll be pretty stunned but…they'll be cool in the end,' he said thoughtfully. 'What about the girls?'

'Jealous,' she smirked and he chuckled.

'Well, I'm all yours forever, Mrs Lupin,' he whispered and she grinned.

'You bet your tight little ass you are,' she retorted, kissing him once more before they heard Professor Dumbledore clear his throat gently behind them.

'Dinner, I think,' he said with a smile. 'But I would like to talk to the both of you tomorrow night. Your parents have made their feelings clear and I would like to hear what you have to say.'

He shooed them into the hall, letting them take their seats before he welcomed the students and apologised for the delay.

'Where've you two been?' James hissed as Dumbledore spoke. 'You weren't on the train.'

Remus shook his head and put a finger to his lips. 'Later,' he said.

* * *

They refused to answer any questions until they were in Gryffindor Tower. He and Emma separated, arranging to meet in their new room soon. Sirius noticed something was amiss first, turning to look at Remus who had sat on the animagus' bed, not unpacking his trunk.

'Where's your stuff?' he asked and James and Peter turned to look at the empty space where Remus' trunk usually was.

'I'm not staying in the room with you guys this year,' he told them, biting his lip. 'I'm sorry I've been so unavailable and secretive this summer but I've got some things to tell you now.'

He began at the start, telling them about he and Emma fooling around to finding out she was his mate to them getting married.

They sat in silence until the end then Peter said, 'You're married?'

Remus nodded, looking at his friends. 'Moony, are you sure about this?' James asked with a worried look. 'Forever is a bloody long time.'

'Especially to be with only one bird,' Sirius muttered, frowning deeply. 'I mean, Emma's a great kisser but…'

Remus stood abruptly, walking to the other side of the room. The wolf had snarled and his hackles rose when he recalled the scent of his friend on Emma earlier in the summer.

'Please don't mention you and Emma,' he said when the other boys stared at him in confusion. 'It…makes me jealous and I…I'm too close to the full moon still to stay in control.'

Sirius looked taken aback but nodded. 'She's really your mate?' he asked and Remus nodded, calming down.

'There's no doubt,' he said, coming a little closer. 'We both felt it happen - we bonded.'

'After you shagged?' grinned Peter and Sirius and James chuckled.

'I suppose that's one benefit of being married,' James said with a grin. 'Sex whenever you want it. No sneaking into each other's rooms. No interruptions from curious room mates…'

He glared at Sirius who laughed. 'I accidentally caught Lily and James in a, um, compromising position a couple of weeks ago,' he told Remus who grinned.

'At least you aren't going to have that problem,' James said, standing to finish unpacking. 'Your own room. I'm jealous.'

'So, you're all ok?' Remus asked and they nodded.

'We just want you to be happy, Moony,' Sirius said. 'If this makes you happy, then we're happy. Go on - you're busting to get back to your hot wife, aren't you?'

Remus grinned then waved good night, walking down a few flights to the room he was sharing now with Emma. She was already in bed reading when he got there.

'Hiya,' she chirped, putting the book down. 'Well?'

'They're happy if I'm happy,' he told her and she grinned.

'So are the girls,' she said and laughed when he started to strip quickly.

'You know what they were most jealous of?' he asked, taking his pants off. 'That I'd have "sex on tap" according to James.'

'Really?' she said with a raised eyebrow. 'I'm not all that sure I'm in the mood tonight…'

He jumped onto the bed naked and she giggled, squealing a little when he pulled her nightshirt off over her head. She was naked underneath and he knew she'd been waiting for this.

'You tease,' he mumbled, latching his mouth onto her neck and sucking lightly. 'You want me bad.'

'Hang on,' she breathed, almost lost for words at the sensation.

Grabbing for her wand, she cast a Silencing spell then threw it down as his lips moved over her shoulder then down to her breast.

'God, this feels so naughty,' she murmured, then hissed as his tongue licked her nipple. 'Doing it at school.'

Remus chuckled, his tongue tracing a moist path down her stomach until it reached her thigh.

'Fuck, you are so wet,' he muttered, running a finger down the crease of her sex. 'So ready.'

She squirmed and he couldn't wait.

'Roll over,' he demanded, flipping her quickly.

He hauled her hips up, feeling his need gaining urgency. Emma too was more than ready and raised herself to her elbows.

'I love it when you're all alpha male,' she whispered then gasped when he entered her fast.

'Shit,' she moaned, pushing back hard.

Remus grabbed her waist, his hands going all the way around. 'I feel like I could break you,' he mumbled, thrusting hard into her.

'Try,' she moaned, pushing back. 'Go harder.'

With a groan, he obliged, and it took only a few deep plunges for Emma to half scream his name, gripping the sheets under her tight. A couple more thrusts and he joined her, holding himself still as he spilled himself inside her.

'Oh my god,' he muttered, falling down on the bed next to her, putting his arm out and drawing her to him. 'I am so very glad you're my mate.'

Emma let out a breath of laughter and made a little contented noise. He kissed her neck, brushing her hair out of the way.

'Hand me my wand?' she mumbled sleepily and he grunted a complaint.

'Don't want to move,' he said and she shifted a little.

'Want a baby before graduation, Lupin?' she retorted with a yawn, chuckling when she felt him rolling over to get the wand.

She ran it over herself, muttering Cleansing and contraceptive charms and turned when she felt him get out of bed.

She watched him rummage around in their as yet unpacked bags for a minute then said, 'Can I help you?'

He looked up and smiled. 'Nope,' he said, standing up. 'Found them.'

He came back over to the bed, crawling in next to her and grabbing her hand. 'Back where it belongs,' he murmured, sliding her plain gold wedding band back onto her finger. He kissed her hand. 'That'll keep all those guys away.'

They hadn't wanted anyone to see their wedding bands before they told their friends and the Headmaster but now they knew, they wanted everyone to know. Remus handed Emma his ring and she smiled, sliding it back onto his finger.

'Mine,' she said softly and he smiled.

'Yours,' he whispered then drew her close for a kiss.

* * *

Their marriage was fodder for gossip until Christmas when everyone went home. Dumbledore had gotten several complaints from parents from the second week, after students had written home with news of the interesting development. He dealt with them quickly and quietly, also the way he dealt with Remus' parents when they visited again, asking him on behalf of Emma's parents as well to speak with their children again. He told them as gently as possible that they were going to have to make a choice: for now, Remus and Emma were not breaking their bonds so they could accept it and try to support their decision, or they could lose contact with the only children they had.

'If they were regretting their choice, or discovering it was a mistake on their own,' he said wisely. 'All this opposition would just be fuelling their desire to stay together when they might otherwise split.'

Mr and Mrs Lupin looked hopeful at his words until he added, 'Although, having spoken with them and observed them together, I doubt they'll be wanting to break their bond anytime soon. Have you considered that perhaps this wasn't a mistake? That they really are in love and thought this through thoroughly before committing?'

'They're so young…' began Mrs Lupin but the Headmaster interrupted.

'Some might say that they are lucky to have found each other so soon,' he suggested. 'Some people never find their mate; perhaps there is a good reason they came together so early in their lives?'

* * *

The young couple decided to stay in the castle when the other students went home, figuring they may as well stay for free rather than pay to stay in the Leaky Cauldron again. They hadn't heard from their parent's except when they wrote to complain, and had no intention of going home to listen to more of the same.

They woke late Christmas morning after a night spent celebrating their first Christmas Eve together.

'Merry Christmas,' Remus whispered in her ear, snuggling close behind her.

'Merry Christmas,' Emma murmured back, wriggling her backside against his already hard cock.

The full moon was that night and as usual, he was insatiable in his need for his mate.

'Are you too sore?' he asked, sliding his hand over her stomach and down.

'A little,' she confessed. They had been vigorous in their numerous celebrations last night.

'Sorry, honey,' he said softly, his face tensing.

He knew he was a bit rougher around the full moon but last night he had been particularly out of control, unable to quench his lust entirely. Hating that he'd hurt her, he removed his hand from her belly and shifted it to himself.

'I'll go to the bathroom,' he murmured, intending on taking care of his immediate problem alone, even though he knew his erection would be back within an hour or so if he relieved himself. His hand just wasn't as effective at sating him as Emma's body was.

'No,' she said, rolling over. 'There are other ways for me to look after my wolf.'

She slid her body over his and kissed him, hard and fast, the way he liked it in the morning. Seeing his weeping cock made her realise how desperate he was and she didn't waste time on foreplay. Ducking down, she took him into her mouth, hearing his approving groan. She took as much of him as she could, forcing back her gag reflex to let him slide down her throat.

'Fuck,' he whispered, feeling the wet tightness massaging his head and he knew he didn't have long.

Thrusting, he forgot about everything except how fucking good this felt and grasped her head as he shouted out her name, coming hard. He felt her swipe her tongue one last time around the tip of his cock then the warmth of her mouth was gone.

Eyes closed, he thought they might have finally managed to exhaust the wolf the drove him.

He felt her reach for her wand and opened his eyes. Blood dripped down her chin and he sat up, eyes wide in horror.

'What the hell?' he exclaimed loudly, pulling her hand away from her mouth so he could see.

'It's alright,' she said, calmly, reaching for her wand. 'Don't, Remus. You'll get blood all over the place.'

She smacked his hand off hers with her wand then pointed it at her face, muttering a basic healing spell then another incantation that made the blood disappear.

'What happened?' he demanded, shocked and she shook her head, touching her mouth gingerly.

'Nothing,' she said, then smiled. 'My lip split. It's fine now.'

Remus stared at her, frowning as he felt self loathing rise inside him. 'I did it?' he said, not really asking. 'How…?'

'My lip caught on my teeth, that's all,' she said, lying back down and grabbing his arm. 'It was just a cut. Lips bleed a lot. Come and lie down with me.'

Remus closed his eyes, horrified that he'd hurt her, then got out of bed. 'I'm just…' he waved his hand in the direction of the bathroom, fear and disgust making his voice break. Quickly he hid behind the door, sitting on the freezing floor as tears rose in his eyes.

'I hurt her,' he whispered, pressing the heels of his hands hard against his eyes.

He felt something warm and fuzzy around his shoulders and saw a dressed Emma sit next to him, draping a blanket around him.

'Honey, it was an accident,' she said softly. 'It was my own fault. I should have been more careful.'

'For God's sake, Jack,' he growled, angry at himself. 'I couldn't have been more fucking inconsiderate if I'd tried. Stop defending me. I hurt you. I did it.'

She looked at him with a frown. 'Yes, you did,' she told him. 'But I could have stopped you. Remus, I know what you are. I know my role as your mate just before the full moon and I'm happy to do it. If it means the occasional cut or bruise, well, I love you enough to overlook it. And I know you'll make it up to me when you can.'

He still looked mutinous and she pulled him closer, kissing his temple. 'Honey, you're leaving me tonight,' she whispered. 'Please don't waste the day worrying about this. Just come and spend some time with me before I lose you to the wolf again.'

Emma felt his body relax some and he leaned more heavily into her. 'I'm sorry, Em,' he said softly and she nodded.

'I know,' she told him. 'On the positive side, I'm sitting next to you, it's been ten minutes since you came and no new hard on. Maybe we finally wore it out.'

Remus chuckled and nodded, standing up then pulling up to her feet. 'Maybe,' he agreed.

'I'm starving,' Emma said cheerfully, pulling his towards the door. 'Let's see if any of the house elves will take pity on us and give us some early lunch.'

* * *

The year flew by and still, their parents weren't softening. They did keep contact, but still refused to accept the situation. NEWTS came and the two did well. Emma applied to the Ministry, and was accepted into a traineeship starting in the new year. Remus was finding it more difficult, his status making it difficult for him to get a job.

The night before they left Hogwarts, they spent with their friends celebrating. Emma found Remus after only a couple of hours.

'Babe, I'm going to bed,' she told him, ignoring Sirius' suggestions about joining her there. 'You don't have to come. I'm just tired still.'

Remus frowned but nodded, kissing her then watching her walk away. She'd been tired a lot lately. They put it down to exams but she was feeling ill as well. Nauseous, crampy, sore back and aching all over. She looked exhausted.

'Stop perving at your wife and drink this Firewhiskey,' Sirius demanded, handing him a glass.

He took it and sculled it down as instructed, soon forgetting about his wife's tiredness for a while.


	11. Chapter 11

**Thanks The Fleaks for your reviews.**

**WARNING: Hope you've got your tissues. This is the second last chappie and it doesn't end well for the couple. SOB!**

* * *

Chapter Eleven

'God, I couldn't be, could I?' Emma said in horror, staring at her mother.

'You're having a sexual relationship,' Mrs Jack said with a flush, still uncomfortable with her daughter's marriage. 'It's always possible.'

'But I do the spells religiously,' she argued. 'We don't want a baby. We aren't anywhere near ready for a baby.'

Her mother shrugged. 'Muggle pills don't always work,' she explained. 'Maybe it's the same for Magical contraception. I'll take you to the doctor.'

'No,' said Emma, standing up. 'I'll go to St Mungo's. Remus can take me. If I am…pregnant, they'll be able to tell me more. The baby…it could be a werewolf.'

She screwed her face up in frustration. 'We are so careful,' she exclaimed, almost stamping her foot like a child instead of an eighteen year old married woman. 'This shouldn't have happened.'

'A lot of things shouldn't have happened over this last year,' her mother retorted darkly, still not liking the fact her daughter was married.

'For God's sake, mum,' she muttered, grabbing her coat and bag. 'Remus and I have been married almost sixteen months now. Can't you please let it go now?'

Their parents were finally coming around. They had all attended the couple's graduation and managed a dinner without any arguing. The Lupin's had offered them an old family house, a shack really, but beggars couldn't be choosers, so they moved in, grateful for some support. Emma's family too were warming up, although she still usually visited without Remus, who did the same with his parents. She'd confided in her mother about her symptoms after her mother commented on her weight loss and pale face. The woman's suggestion that she could be pregnant terrified Emma.

Saying a quick goodbye to her mother, Emma walked to the Lupin's house, knocking and smiling at John Lupin when he opened the door.

'Hello, Emma,' he said, surprising her by hugging her. 'Remus was just about to leave.'

He took her through to the living room, seeing Remus hugging his mother. 'Hey,' he said in surprise. 'I thought we were meeting at home?'

Walking over to her, he slipped his hand into hers. 'Couldn't stay away,' she teased and he grinned, kissing her.

'Alright,' he said to his parents. 'I guess I'll see you in a week or so.'

They said their farewells then Remus turned to look at Emma. 'What's wrong?' he asked, sensing her disquiet.

'Mum thinks I might be pregnant,' she said reluctantly and he looked stunned. 'Apparently, most of my symptoms match. Nausea, exhaustion, cramps, aches and pains…'

'But we're so careful,' he insisted, seemingly horrified and she nodded.

'I know. Can you come with me to St Mungo's?' she asked. 'They can tell me and…well, we can decide what we're going to do.'

Remus nodded, taking her arm and apparating them to the hospital.

* * *

They waited for an hour before a Healer could see them. Emma told her about how she'd been feeling and mentioned their fears.

'Alright,' the woman, Martha, said. 'It'll be a quick answer. Are you ready?'

Remus tightened his grip on her hand and they nodded. The woman muttered an incantation as she waved her wand over Emma's abdomen. She frowned and did it again, this time adding another incantation.

'Well?' Emma asked impatiently and the woman shook her head, the frown deepening.

'No, love,' she answered. 'You're not pregnant.'

Both teenagers breathed a sign of relief and grinned at each other. 'Thank Merlin,' Remus muttered and Emma went to sit up.

'Hold on a moment,' Martha told her, gently pushing her back down. 'I want to run another test.'

Emma frowned but nodded, lying back on the bed. The woman waved her wand, a series of complicated looking movements and mumbled under her breath. It was five minutes before she stopped and looked at Emma.

'How long have you been feeling this way?' she asked and Emma thought.

'Since we left school in July' she said, but Remus shook his head.

'No, it's been longer than that,' he corrected. 'Remember, babe? You felt bad during exams and before, while we were studying so hard? That's when you started to feel really tired and sore.'

Emma nodded in agreement. 'So it's November now,' Martha said. 'You started feeling like this…'

'I suppose it would have been not long after our birthdays,' Emma mused. 'I don't remember feeling bad then. So, June, I guess. That's when we really hit the books hard.'

She looked at the woman. 'I'm sorry,' she said with a grin. 'If I'd actually thought about it, I would have realised I wasn't pregnant - it's been too long. I could've almost had a baby by now.'

The woman didn't smile, instead sitting down and indicating they should do the same. 'Emma,' she said gently, her face grim. 'My exam shows you have a mass. In your pancreas. It's quite large and…it's cancer.'

Emma's face drained of colour and Remus' eyes widened. 'You're a witch, but you're from a Muggle background,' the woman continued. 'Full blood or half blood magic folk aren't prone to cancer but being from a non Magical background…'

'What…what do we do?' Remus asked shakily, staring at her intently.

She bit her lip and looked at Emma, who immediately knew what she was going to say. 'Pancreatic cancer is bad,' she said softly, her voice shaking. 'My grandfather had it. By the time symptoms show themselves….' She stopped, unable to say it.

'It's often too late to do anything,' Martha said gently, looking sympathetically at Emma. 'I'm very sorry, love, but with the size and progression of the cancer, there's nothing that can be done. Magically or Muggle.'

* * *

It felt like the world had stopped, frozen.

Remus and Emma were both still, staring at the Healer as if waiting for the punch line.

'What…what do you mean?' Remus stammered eventually. He turned to look at Emma whose face was blank, in shock. 'There has to be something. A potion or a spell.'

The woman shook her head and he felt a sudden surge of anger towards her.

'Don't just sit there shaking your head!' he yelled as he jumped up. 'We're fucking magic for Merlins' sake. Just fix her. Give her something to make it go away.'

The Healer stood as well and looked him in the eye. 'There is nothing anyone can do now,' she said softly.

She looked at Emma, who was slowly rising to her feet as well. 'I would say that you'll see Christmas, love, but I'm afraid I think you'll miss New Years. I'm so sorry, both of you. Do you have any questions or…?'

'No,' Emma said, her eyes wide and dark in her deathly pale face. 'No. Not right now.'

Martha nodded and put her hand on Emma's arm. 'Come back and see me when you've had some time to digest this,' she told her. 'We can do something to make you more comfortable... later.'

Emma nodded and the woman left the room, leaving Remus furious. 'What the hell is she talking about?' he spat, turning to look at Emma. 'What was she saying about New Year's?'

Emma gazed at him, seeing that he hadn't taken in what he'd been told yet. 'Remus,' she said, blinking rapidly. 'Let's go home.'

'But don't they have to give you something?' he asked in bewilderment and she shook her head.

'I'll come back,' she promised, just wanting to get out of there now. 'Please take me home. Please, baby?'

He nodded reluctantly and apparated them home, spending the next ten minutes raving about that woman.

'We'll go back and see another Healer,' he mumbled, slamming tea cups around as he made them a drink. 'I think she's mad.'

He put the tea down in front of Emma who grabbed his arm and pulled him onto the couch next to her.

'Remus,' she said softly, speaking for the first time since they'd gotten home. 'She's not mad.'

He stared at her and she saw the anger slowly draining from his face. It had been his shield, his defence mechanism - get angry and I don't have to think about it. But now…

'She must have made a mistake, Em,' he whispered. 'You're eighteen. You've got a job to go to after Christmas and we've got each other… She made a mistake.'

Emma just looked at him, watching as anger turned into denial.

'There has to be something,' he insisted, standing up. 'There has to be a cure, a potion. I'm going to the library. There's got to be something.'

'Remus,' Emma said as he pulled on his coat. She bit her lip when she saw the underlying terror in his eyes. 'Just...be careful.'

He looked at her with wide, haunted looking eyes and nodded, coming to her and kissing her hard.

'This is bull shit, Em,' he told her. 'I'll find something.'

She tried to smile and nodded, not wanting to rob him of the little hope he had. Not yet. Any book he found would do that for her.

* * *

He left and Emma curled up on the couch, remembering seeing her grandfather before he died. He'd been in hospital for weeks and just got more and more weak; helpless. She shuddered, not wanting her end to be like that.

'I won't see New Years Day,' she whispered, counting the days then feeling a wave of despair run through her.

'Fifty days,' she thought. 'Give or take. That's all I've got left.'

The tears finally came and for an hour she sobbed for everything she was going to lose. Remus, her parents, her friends, the future they'd planned together. After there were no more tears left to fall, she lay quietly, staring off blankly into space before she struggled to her feet and walked slowly to the bathroom to shower, feeling a heavy weight that was the cancer inside her now.

Acceptance came reluctantly as she realised that, deep down, on some plane; on some level, she'd known. That's why she had never gone to the nurse or the doctor; why she'd downplayed her symptoms. She'd known.

'And now, I have to be strong,' she told herself, brushing her wet hair then pulling it into a ponytail. 'Because Remus will not accept this as easily.'

* * *

But she was wrong.

When Remus returned it was dark and she could tell from the look on his face that he understood now and that he, like her, had done his crying alone. 'You should be resting,' he admonished when he saw her cooking.

'I like cooking,' she murmured, throwing some carrots into water. 'The Muggle way takes longer but it's therapeutic.'

He watched her for a moment then grabbed another knife and chopped the potatoes, something he never did. He always used magic. They chopped the vegetables then Remus checked the pie in the oven, taking it out and serving it up. Silence reigned over dinner, Remus frowning when Emma picked at her food. They cleaned up magically though Emma wiped the bench down by hand.

She was nearly done when she felt Remus' arms encircled her from behind. His chin rested on her shoulder, face turned into her neck and his body was pressed up against hers. Emma dropped the cloth and leaned back into him, her eyes closing as they drew strength from each other. They didn't need words. They completely understood each other.

'I love you, Em,' he whispered into her ear.

'I love you, too,' she said softly, then turned into his arms, kissing him.

His hands cupped her face then he lifted her so she was on tiptoe, holding her as close as she could physically get as they kissed. Walking back to their bedroom, they shed as many clothes as possible, the rest falling as they lay on the bed. They went slow, Remus' mouth caressing every inch of her body, memorising every curve, every change in texture, the taste and feel of it as if it were the last time. Emma giggled when his fingers tickled her and the sound bought unexpected tears to his eyes. He tried to cover his emotions, pushing his body slowly into hers. They moved together, came together then cried together when the raw emotion could no longer be contained.

* * *

They lay awake all night, talking and touching, avoiding the discussions they knew they'd have to have tomorrow. Daylight crept across the floor and, when it hit the bed, Emma got up.

'I have to go to mum and dad's,' she said softly when he told her to lay back down. 'I have to tell them sooner rather than later. I don't have a whole lot of later left.'

Remus swallowed hard and sat up, swinging his legs over the edge of the bed.

'You stay and get some sleep,' she said but he shook his head, coming across to her and kissing her.

'Where you go, I go,' he said then flinched.

Emma knew what he was thinking and smiled at him. 'Not everywhere, baby,' she told him gently as she cupped his face in her hand. 'Not for a long time. Not for you.'

He bit his suddenly shaky lip then drew in a deep breath, regaining control. 'Miracles happen sometimes, Em,' he murmured, touching her hair. 'Please don't give up hope yet.'

'I won't,' she assured him. 'But I'm not going to live whatever time I've got left in denial either.'

He looked shaky still but nodded, disappearing into the bathroom for longer than necessary for his toilette. When he emerged, he looked different. His face was stronger and calmer and, although his blue eyes were now red rimmed, they were determined. He took Emma's shoulders and sat her down at the table, finishing making their breakfast himself.

He'd given himself a metaphorical slap in the bathroom, telling himself firmly, 'There'll be time all too soon for tears and sooking. Don't waste one more second of this time with Em crying. She's the one that's hurting. If she can be strong for us, I can be too.'

Vowing to never let her see him upset again, he washed his face and felt a kind of peace come over him.

* * *

He apparated them to Emma's parent's house but Emma stopped. 'I want your parents there too,' she said, looking up at him. 'I don't want to have to do this over and over.' Remus nodded, walking down the street and surprising his parents.

'We didn't think we'd see you again so soon,' Mrs Lupin said then her smile faded when she saw his face. 'What's wrong?'

'I need you to come to Emma's parents house,' he told them. 'Now. Please?'

'What is it?' his father asked in concern but he shook his head.

'We only want to do this once, dad,' he said softly, unable to hide his distress from his parents. 'I'll meet you there.'

He left them to finish getting dressed and jogged back to Emma, who was waiting by the front fence.

'I didn't want to go in alone,' she admitted and he smiled.

'You don't have to do anything alone anymore, Em,' he told her then took her hand as they entered the house just minutes before Remus' parents.

* * *

Her parents were also surprised to see them but when Remus' parents arrived as well, Mrs Jack thought she understood.

'Oh, Emma,' she said, disappointed as they all sat down. 'No.'

'No,' Emma agreed. 'I'm not pregnant, mum.'

Her parents looked relieved; Remus' startled. 'You thought you were pregnant?' Mrs Lupin asked, staring at Emma.

'I'm not,' she repeated.

'Wish you were,' Remus muttered, heard by Emma and his father.

'Remus, you know how dangerous a pregnancy…'

'Dad, don't,' he cut in loudly, startling all four parents with his uncharacteristic display of temper, then bit his lip.

Softly, he said, 'Em, do you want me to…?'

'No,' she said, squeezing his hand so tightly it hurt. 'I'll do it.'

* * *

**Christmas Day**

'God, that is hideous,' Emma said softly, smiling at Remus.

'I guess he meant it as a joke,' Remus said, chuckling a little at her gift from Sirius - a jumper with a cartoon werewolf howling on the front of it.

Emma smiled then winced as a pain shot through her.

Remus saw. 'I'll get your drink now,' he said, standing up and putting the jumper down. 'Before you get up.'

She smiled and he kissed her head before going down to the kitchen.

Her mother was there and murmured, 'Merry Christmas' when she saw him. He repeated her words then reached for Emma's tea.

'Is Emma awake yet?' she asked and he nodded.

'Don't go in yet, though,' he told her, pouring hot water over the leaves. 'She needs her tea first and…and she's not particularly strong this morning.'

Mrs Jack looked at him. 'What tea?' she asked and he looked at her.

'Herb tea recommended by the Healer,' he told her, holding up the box. 'If she drinks it before she sits up and moves around, she seems to be a little stronger. I don't know if it really helps or whether we just want it to but…'

He shrugged and finished making the tea.

'Should I make some toast?' she asked but he shook his head.

'I'll get her some in an hour or so,' he said, picking up the cup. 'She can't stomach food this soon after waking up. The tea will help her keep it down but she's not been eating much. The pain potions put her off food when she's got almost no appetite already but…she needs them more than she needs a lot of food now. I've got another potion to help her nutrition.'

Mrs Jack bit her lip and watched him walk towards the stairs. 'You've done a good job,' she said suddenly. He turned to look at her.

'Looking after her,' she continued shakily. 'When we all fell apart, you looked after her. I know I never supported your marriage but…I'm very glad she's had you.'

Remus smiled. 'Well, I love her,' he said simply. 'She's my mate. What else would I do?'

* * *

He walked up the stairs back to the room he and Emma now shared; the room he'd spent so much time in while they were growing up. Her parents had asked them to move back in with them but for over a month they resisted, Remus caring for an increasingly weak Emma at their house - his only time away was the full moon. Last night had been their first night here - Emma deciding Remus was taking on too much by himself now and wanting to be closer to her parents.

They both knew the end was near. She was growing weaker by the day now, the progression of the disease hastening each hour.

Remus looked at her lying in bed for a few moments before he walked into the room. She was so very thin, her skin almost translucent. Her hair had started falling out and she barely had the strength to sit up now. Pain racked her tiny body, needing constant potions to try and ease the ache inside. She still smiled for him though, refusing to let the cancer rob her of her sense of humour.

'Tea,' he said, sitting next to her on the bed.

He helped her drink it, watching a little colour come into her wan cheeks as it warmed her. 'Here,' he said, holding a pain potion to her lips when she'd finished.

She drank it obediently, then sat back with a sigh. She hated this. Hated feeling so weak and useless. Hated that she'd saddled Remus with a dying wife. Hated that this disease was going to take her from the ones she loved. Hated that she couldn't fight anymore; that she didn't want to fight anymore.

'Your mum wants to see you,' he said, watching her closely. Even when she still had the strength to hide her pain, he knew the signs. Now, she couldn't even try to disguise the effect the illness had on her. 'Should I tell her to come up?'

'I'll go down there,' she mumbled and he frowned.

'Baby, don't fuss,' she said in a hoarse voice, sounding breathless. 'What's the point in having a big, strong mate if he doesn't cart you around?'

He smiled, then helped her pull her dressing gown on before picking her up and carrying her down the stairs, settling her on the couch where she managed to greet her parents before she fell asleep again - the tiny amount of activity had worn her out.

* * *

They had a nice morning with both sets of parents, Emma drifting in and out of sleep, but at lunch time he saw that she'd had enough. Just sitting up and talking for the little while she had was draining her.

'I'm taking Emma back upstairs,' he told his father as they cleared the table. 'I'll stay with her so I guess I'll see you later.'

'Remus,' his father said. 'The way you've handled this…The way you've looked after Emma..' His eyes filled with tears which he blinked away quickly. 'I'm proud of you.'

'I haven't done anything, dad,' he said softly. 'She's my wife. Of course I'm going to be there for her. There's no where else I'd want to be.'

His father nodded and hugged him, then left to hug Emma. Remus took a deep breath, fighting back his emotions before he went back into the living room. 'Bye, sweetheart,' his mother said, letting go of Emma and hugging him.

'Bye, mum,' he said, then sat next to his wife.

'I want to get you back into bed, gorgeous,' he teased and she smiled tiredly.

'You are insatiable,' she murmured, her eyes drooping a little.

Remus' smile faltered. This was the weakest she'd ever been and it hit him very hard and very suddenly. This was it. She didn't have another day; the time she had left was going to be measured in hours now.

'I_ could_ do it, you know,' she whispered when he picked her up.

'I know,' he told her with a smile. 'I just like carrying you around. Makes me feel like a macho man.'

She made a noise that sounded like a laugh then let her head fall onto his shoulder as her parents watched him carry her upstairs. By the time he got to their room, she was asleep again.

He settled her carefully into bed then disappeared into the bathroom, barely getting in the door before he vomited into the sink. He retched again, then ran water into the bowl. As the water swirled down the drain, he felt all his fear; all his grief rising and he sank slowly to the floor, weeping, trying unsuccessfully to muffle his sobs. He'd known the end was really close but to have it almost on them was too much. True to his vow, he'd never let her see him upset or scared. After a bad day, he did all his crying in the shower or late at night in the bathroom where she couldn't see or hear him.

'Remus?' he heard her father say, pushing the door open.

He quickly wiped his face as the man entered the room and struggled to his feet. Mr Jack stared at him for a few moments then stepped forward and embraced him.

'Thank you for looking after our girl, son,' he said softly. 'It's nearly over, isn't it?'

The man pulled away, his own eyes overflowing. Remus nodded, drawing himself taller as he gathered the little strength he had left.

'Yeah,' he said, strangely calm. 'It's nearly over now.'


	12. Chapter 12

**Couldn't leave you with that and I decided to get the crying (mine) over with. Had to finish this story up tonight. Hope you enjoyed it and if you did, review me!**

* * *

Chapter Twelve

The funeral was huge. Emma was so bright and sunny - she had many friends. Remus sat staring straight ahead, Sirius, James, Lily and Peter on one side, his father, mother and Emma's parents on the other. He was unable to look at the coffin that now held the lifeless body that used to be his wife, the flowers - her favourite orchids; the photographs of a healthy, smiling Emma. The kind and complimentary words from his friends and family about his wife and their sorrow at her passing flowed unheard over him as did the sobs from those around him.

He'd already said his goodbyes - with his wife.

* * *

_She only just made it to Boxing Day, waking one last time and, surprisingly, she was stronger than she had been for weeks. She'd looked at him curled up in bed with her and smiled. For an age, they gazed at each other, her hand on his chest, over his heart as she felt it's steady beat. His hands ran gently over her, memorising every single nuance of her face._

'_You have to find another mate,' she said suddenly and he frowned. _

'_Bit late to start thinking about threesomes, baby,' he joked and she smiled at him. _

'_I couldn't share you,' she said softly. 'I kind of fancy you, you know. But…since I'm not going to be around much longer…' _

_His smile faded and for the first time since she was diagnosed, he let her see his fear. 'We both know it'll be tonight or tomorrow,' she said gently. 'I don't want you to think you'll only ever have one mate. I don't want you to be miserable.' _

'_Permission to be a little bit miserable?' he asked, stroking a trembling finger over her face. 'I do sort of fancy you a little.' _

'_A little bit,' she relented. 'Just for a while then I want you to get on with your life. Don't hide away, Lupin. You've got a long life ahead of you, baby. Don't die with me.' _

_At that, he broke. _

_'Em,' he whispered desperately, a sob shaking him as he laid his head on her chest, begging her. 'Please don't leave me.' _

_In the face of his grief, she lost grip of her control as well, both of them crying together for the first time since the night she was diagnosed, whispering their love; their adoration as they held onto each other. _

_When her parents woke in the morning, Remus was still awake; still holding her, but Emma had let go._

* * *

Just over a month after the funeral, Sirius, James and Peter appeared on his doorstep with two bottles of Firewhiskey and refused to take no for an answer, pushing their way into the house. He'd done exactly what Emma had asked him not to do - he'd hidden himself away and shut down. He was unshowered, unshaven, refused medical treatment for the horrific injuries he'd inflicted upon himself at the full moon, just one week after Emma's death. His parents had bought a Healer to him, desperately trying to help him. He'd eventually let the man heal his wounds then sent him and his parents away.

He got absolutely ratted on the alcohol and all the pent up grief and anguish came flooding out. Sirius and James had deliberately watered down their bottle of Whiskey so they were sober enough to help him, listening to his rants about how unfair it was that he'd lost Emma; then holding him as he sobbed.

Once he seemed to have gotten a lot of it out, they wrangled him into a shower and clean clothes, Sirius casting a charm to rid him of his scraggly beard. They slept with him, taking turns to stay awake and comfort him when he woke sobbing, and the next day, gave him pain potions for his hangover and fed him the first decent meal he'd had in months. They laughed at Peter who they didn't have enough potion for, and Remus smiled as well, able to see the light at the end of the tunnel for the first time.

Emma didn't want this; had told him not to do this, so he wouldn't. His allowed miserable period was over and now, his mate would want him to start to get on with his life.

And he always did what Emma wanted.

* * *

**Nineteen years later**

He opened his eyes, looking at an impossibly bright blue sky. He realised that he didn't hurt. Stretching experimentally: there was no pain, no aches.

'Impossible,' he thought with a frown. 'I was hit. I know I was hit. Not even a useless prat like Dolohov could've missed that shot.'

Sitting up, he looked around. There was no sign of fighting; no sign of the fallen bodies; no sign of Hogwarts castle where the Final Battle had been raging.

'What the hell?' he mumbled then heard a voice behind him.

'Not hell,' it said. 'Somehow, we went the other way. Go figure.'

He turned and saw a strangely youthful looking Sirius Black grinning at him. 'Hey, Moony,' he said and Remus smiled disbelievingly.

'Pads, how…?' he stuttered, standing up. He looked around. 'Where am I?'

Sirius' now unlined face changed and suddenly he knew.

'I'm dead,' he whispered, eyes widening. 'I'm dead, aren't I?'

Sirius nodded. Remus felt a little shocked but accepted what he was told without question, knowing instinctively it was true. He was surprised he wasn't more upset.

'It's nice here,' Sirius said, coming closer. 'You'll like it.'

'My son,' Remus said, looking at Sirius. 'I have a son.'

'I know,' the dark haired man soothed. 'He'll be fine. Tonks was sent back to him. It wasn't her time.'

Remus nodded, relieved. He didn't feel sad or angry or afraid. He felt at peace. He felt different. He wasn't tired. He wasn't weary. He ran a hand over his face and felt smooth skin. His scars were gone.

'No wounds here,' Sirius said, watching him discover his healing. 'No illness. You'll still have the wolf inside you because it's part of you now but you won't transform again. Pretty good, huh?'

Remus nodded and looked at Sirius. 'Are James and Lily here too?' he asked and Sirius nodded.

'Still as crazy about each other as ever,' he moaned without malice. 'It's still just as nauseating.'

'Is this where I'll stay now?' he asked Sirius who shook his head.

'No,' he told him. 'This is just a meeting point. I was sent to greet you - although there was some argument about that. You're a popular guy up here. Eternity is very much like real life, Moony. But there's no pain; no fear; no sadness. Just peace. Not a bad place to spend forever.'

Remus nodded.

'Plus,' Sirius added, looking over Remus' shoulder. 'You get to reunite with the people you love.'

Her name popped into his head at the same time he smelled her scent. He spun around and, when he saw her, joy; unspeakable, indescribable joy that he hadn't felt in years, flooded through him.

Emma.

Beautiful, healthy, healed Emma.

'You got old, Lupin,' she teased, laughing. 'Good thing I fancy older men.'

**A/N: Fin**


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